Cinematic Hindenburgs
These movies are catastrophic fails. Some of these are so awful as to be hilarious studies in how not to make movies. If you want to see something you know will be good check out my "Cinema Classics" list (http://www.imdb.com/list/tctWRWAcEds). VoteForRodneyLewis.com
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- DirectorCurtis HansonStarsEminemBrittany MurphyKim BasingerFollows a young rapper in the Detroit area, struggling with every aspect of his life; he wants to make it big but his friends and foes make this odyssey of rap harder than it may seem.
- DirectorGreg MottolaStarsJesse EisenbergKristen StewartRyan ReynoldsIn the summer of 1987, a college graduate takes a 'nowhere' job at his local amusement park, only to find it's the perfect course to get him prepared for the real world.
- DirectorJohn HuddlesStarsJames D'ArcySophie LoweDaryl SabaraAt an international school in Jakarta, a philosophy teacher challenges his class of twenty graduating seniors to choose which ten of them would take shelter underground and reboot the human race in the event of a nuclear apocalypse.
- DirectorMark MylodStarsSacha Baron CohenEmilio RiveraGina La PianaAli G unwittingly becomes a pawn in the Chancellor's plot to overthrow the Prime Minister of Great Britain. However, Ali is embraced by the nation as a voice of the youth, making the PM and his government more popular than ever.
- DirectorAnton CorbijnStarsGeorge ClooneyPaolo BonacelliViolante PlacidoAn assassin hides out in Italy for one last assignment.
- DirectorGeorge LucasStarsRichard DreyfussRon HowardPaul Le MatA group of teenagers in California's central valley spend one final night after their 1962 high school graduation cruising the strip with their buddies before they pursue their varying goals.
- DirectorSam RaimiStarsBruce CampbellEmbeth DavidtzMarcus GilbertWhen Ash Williams is accidentally transported to 1300 A.D., he must retrieve the Necronomicon and battle an army of the dead in order to return home.
- DirectorBarry LevinsonStarsBruce WillisBilly Bob ThorntonCate BlanchettTwo bank robbers fall in love with the girl they've kidnapped.
- DirectorJonathan LiebesmanStarsAaron EckhartMichelle RodriguezBridget MoynahanA squad of U.S. Marines becomes the last line of defense against a global invasion.
- DirectorTim GarrickStarsNat WolffSelena GomezMary-Louise ParkerTeenager Rick Stevens has a crush on Nina Pennington. They form a friendship and take a rock'n'roll journey together while Nina deals with her overbearing boyfriend Kevin.
- DirectorSean MathiasStarsLothaire BluteauClive OwenMick JaggerIn 1930s Berlin, a gay Jew is sent to a concentration camp under the Nazi regime.An effective protagonist is one the audience actually gives a crap about.
- DirectorDaniel MyrickEduardo SánchezStarsHeather DonahueMichael C. WilliamsJoshua LeonardThree film students vanish after traveling into a Maryland forest to film a documentary on the local Blair Witch legend, leaving only their footage behind.
- DirectorFernando MeirellesStarsJulianne MooreMark RuffaloGael García BernalA city is ravaged by an epidemic of instant white blindness.Force-fed moralism, half-baked philosophy, emotional manipulation with an all-star cast.
- DirectorMort NathanStarsCuba Gooding Jr.Horatio SanzRoselyn SanchezTwo straight men mistakenly end up on a "gays only" cruise.
- DirectorJennifer LynchStarsJulian SandsSherilyn FennBill PaxtonA surgeon becomes obsessed with the seductive woman he once was in an affair with. Refusing to accept that she has moved on, he amputates her limbs and holds her captive in his mansion.
- DirectorMichael CurtizStarsHumphrey BogartIngrid BergmanPaul HenreidA cynical expatriate American cafe owner struggles to decide whether or not to help his former lover and her fugitive husband escape the Nazis in French Morocco.Everyone goes on about what an incredible movie this is. I gave it a chance. It was boring and I did not detect any chemistry between the two leads whatsoever. I don't know what Casablanca other people are talking about but the one I saw was overblown, heavy-handed crap.
- DirectorPat O'ConnorStarsChris O'DonnellMinnie DriverGeraldine O'RaweThree women, who've been friends since childhood, meet at university in Dublin in 1957. Student and boyfriend life begins.
- DirectorKelsey T. HowardStarsEdward FurlongDaniel FranzeseAndrew KeeganReeling from his dismissal from a reality show, a deranged runner-up holds a group of co-eds hostage on the set of his own fictitious show, where losers suffer a deadly fate.
- DirectorJohn Erick DowdleStarsChris MessinaCaroline DhavernasBokeem WoodbineA group of people are trapped in an elevator and the Devil is mysteriously amongst them.Headline: "M. Night Shyamallamadingdongman Takes Another Crap on the Silver Screen"
Subhead: "Still Not Considerate Enough for a Courtesy Flush" - DirectorJames SignorelliStarsRodney DangerfieldJoe PesciGeraldine FitzgeraldTo inherit his mother-in-law's colossal fortune, a hard-living gambling addict must change his unhealthy ways before they get the best of him.
- DirectorCiarán FoyStarsCharlie ShotwellKelly ReillyMax MartiniA boy receiving treatment for his auto-immune disorder discovers that the house he's living in isn't as safe as he thought.
- DirectorSam RaimiStarsBruce CampbellEllen SandweissRichard DeManincorFive friends travel to a cabin in the woods, where they unknowingly release flesh-possessing demons.
- DirectorIvan ReitmanStarsDavid DuchovnyOrlando JonesJulianne MooreA fire-fighting cadet, two college professors, and a geeky but sexy government scientist work against an alien organism that has been rapidly evolving since its arrival on Earth inside a meteor.
- DirectorSam RaimiStarsCate BlanchettKatie HolmesKeanu ReevesA fortune teller with extrasensory perception is asked to help find a young woman who has mysteriously disappeared.
- DirectorVondie Curtis-HallStarsMariah CareyEric BenétMax BeesleyA young singer dates a disc jockey who helps her get into the music business, but their relationship become complicated as she ascends to super stardom.She spends the whole stupid movie with this dumb look on her face like she just accidentally farted a little but maybe, if she only smiles big and bright enough, hopefully everyone will be nice and pretend not to notice.