Not So Good
A list of films that were a disappointment to me--by my opinion. I have disengaged comments on this list to ward off abuse. We all have opinions, and by my opinion, these movies weren't that great.
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- DirectorKevin SmithStarsJason MewesKevin SmithAmy NobleThe comic "Bluntman and Chronic" is based on real-life stoners Jay and Silent Bob, so when they get no profit from a big-screen adaptation, they set out to wreck the movie.I can't believe I sat through the whole movie. No brainpower here.
- DirectorJared HessStarsJack BlackAna de la RegueraHéctor JiménezBerated all his life by those around him, a monk follows his dream and dons a mask to moonlight as a Luchador (Mexican wrestler).Nonsense from beginning to end.
- DirectorBobby FarrellyPeter FarrellyStarsJack BlackGwyneth PaltrowJason AlexanderA shallow man falls in love with a 300-pound woman because of her inner beauty.
- DirectorLana WachowskiLilly WachowskiStarsKeanu ReevesLaurence FishburneCarrie-Anne MossWhen a beautiful stranger leads computer hacker Neo to a forbidding underworld, he discovers the shocking truth--the life he knows is the elaborate deception of an evil cyber-intelligence.Too complicated to amount to anything and overrated.
- DirectorKevin SmithStarsBrian O'HalloranJeff AndersonRosario DawsonA calamity at Dante and Randal's shops sends them looking for new horizons - but they ultimately settle at the fast food empire Mooby's.Perverted
- StarsRichard ThomasTim ReidAnnette O'TooleIn 1960, seven pre-teen outcasts fight an evil demon who poses as a child-killing clown. Thirty years later, they reunite to stop the demon once and for all when it returns to their hometown.The first half was actually pretty good, but the ending killed the entire film. A giant spider, some of the worst special effects I have ever seen, eating people in the sewers.
- DirectorLawrence KasdanStarsMorgan FreemanThomas JaneJason LeeFriends on a camping trip discover that the town they're vacationing in is being plagued in an unusual fashion by parasitic aliens from outer space.
- DirectorJoseph L. MankiewiczRouben MamoulianStarsElizabeth TaylorRichard BurtonRex HarrisonQueen Cleopatra VII of Egypt experiences both triumph and tragedy as she attempts to resist the imperial ambitions of Rome.Overpriced and overlong.
- DirectorBeeban KidronStarsRenée ZellwegerColin FirthHugh GrantAfter finding love, Bridget Jones questions if she really has everything she'd ever dreamed of having.Stinker all around! Another reason I do not like sequals.
- DirectorLasse HallströmStarsKevin SpaceyJulianne MooreJudi DenchAn emotionally beaten man with his young daughter moves to his ancestral home in Newfoundland to reclaim his life.This movie was a winner with the critics, but a real snoozefest for me. I just couldn't get into it, so halfway through I turned it off.
- DirectorDaniel MyrickEduardo SánchezStarsHeather DonahueMichael C. WilliamsJoshua LeonardThree film students vanish after traveling into a Maryland forest to film a documentary on the local Blair Witch legend, leaving only their footage behind.Talk about a headache. When I left the theater, my eyes were throbbing. This was a really, really bad movie, so bad I hate even calling it that. It was a sham.
- DirectorMartin ScorseseStarsWillem DafoeHarvey KeitelBarbara HersheyThe life of Jesus Christ, his journey through life as he faces the struggles all humans do, and his final temptation on the cross.Being a Christian, this movie greatly offended me even at age 16.
- DirectorGeorge A. RomeroStarsHal HolbrookLeslie NielsenAdrienne Barbeau"Creepshow" is a 1982 movie that tells five grisly tales from a children's comic book: a murdered father rising from his grave, a bizarre meteor, a vengeful husband, a mysterious crate's occupant, and a plague of cockroaches.Cheesy horror. The cockroach scene is just too much.
- DirectorBetty ThomasStarsShelley LongGary ColeChristine TaylorThe original 1970s TV family is now placed in the 1990s, where they're even more square and out of place than ever.Even worse than the sitcom. :)
- DirectorWilliam DearStarsJohn LithgowMelinda DillonMargaret LangrickThe Henderson family adopt a friendly Sasquatch but have a hard time trying to keep the legend of 'Bigfoot' a secret.Maybe good for the kiddies.
- DirectorJohn PaysonStarsJerry O'ConnellMegan WardBilly WestA nice guy has just moved to New York and discovers that he must share his run-down apartment with a couple thousand singing, dancing cockroaches.Anybody want some roaches?
- DirectorJoe DanteStarsTom HanksBruce DernCarrie FisherAn overstressed suburbanite and his neighbors are convinced that the new family on the block is part of a murderous Satanic cult.I almost wanted to like this movie being a Hanks fan, but it was just too absurd.
- DirectorNeil LaButeStarsNicolas CageEllen BurstynLeelee SobieskiA sheriff investigating the disappearance of a young girl from a small island discovers there's a larger mystery to solve among the island's secretive, neo-pagan community.
- DirectorPatricia BirchStarsMichelle PfeifferMaxwell CaulfieldLorna LuftA British student at a 1960s American high school must prove himself to the leader of a girls' gang whose members can only date greasers.
- DirectorTrey ParkerStarsTrey ParkerMatt StoneElle RussPopular Broadway actor Gary Johnston is recruited by the elite counter-terrorism organization Team America: World Police. As the world begins to crumble around him, he must battle with terrorists, celebrities and falling in love.This film was hugely popular, but I thought it was raunchy and disgusting and much too graphic. Sorry fans, this movie was terrible.
- DirectorJoe JohnstonStarsRick MoranisMatt FrewerMarcia StrassmanThe scientist father of a teenage girl and boy accidentally shrinks his and two other neighborhood teens to the size of insects. Now the teens must fight diminutive dangers as the father searches for them.Rediculous plot had me snoozing.
- DirectorGarry MarshallStarsMatt DillonHector ElizondoMolly McCarthyA recent high-school graduate unsure of his future gets a summer job at the Flamingo beach club, and meets the charismatic Phil Brody.It's not so much that I didn't like this film--it was watchable. It just struggled to hold my attention all the way through. I kept pausing it to do things around the house, a sure sign a movie is boring me. I think I sat through it until the end because Matt Dillion was a teenage heartthrob of mine back in the day. :)
- DirectorFrancis Ford CoppolaStarsJames CaanShirley KnightRobert DuvallWhen a housewife finds out she is pregnant, she runs out of town looking for freedom to reevaluate her life decisions.
- DirectorEric DarnellTim JohnsonLawrence GutermanStarsWoody AllenSharon StoneGene HackmanA rather neurotic ant tries to break from his totalitarian society while trying to win the affection of the princess he loves.This movie isn't for the kiddies who can put two and two together, due to it's sexually suggestive humor. Adults might be bored like I was. Animation was okay for it's day, but overall not much of a crowd-pleaser.
- DirectorMark WatersStarsMatthew McConaugheyJennifer GarnerEmma StoneWhile attending his brother's wedding, a serial womanizer is haunted by the ghosts of his past girlfriends.I didn't care for this one even though I am a fan of this actor
- DirectorJim SheridanStarsJake GyllenhaalNatalie PortmanTobey MaguireWhile on tour in Afghanistan, Sam's helicopter is shot down and he is presumed dead. Back home, it is his screw-up brother who looks after the family. Sam does return, but with a lot of excess baggage.I rate this about a C- because it wasn't horrible, but it was definately a disappointment.
- DirectorRon HowardStarsVal KilmerJoanne WhalleyWarwick DavisA young farmer is chosen to undertake a perilous journey in order to protect a special baby from an evil queen.Awful, awful film.
- DirectorMark HelfrichStarsDane CookJessica AlbaDan FoglerIn order to keep the woman of his dreams from falling for another guy, Charlie Logan has to break the curse that has made him wildly popular with single women: Sleep with Charlie once, and the next man you meet will be your true love.
- DirectorBrandon CampStarsJennifer AnistonAaron EckhartDan FoglerA widower whose book about coping with loss turns him into a best-selling self-help guru, falls for the hotel florist where his seminar is given, only to learn that he hasn't yet truly confronted his wife's passing.I didn't like this one. I love the actress, so I was disappointed.
- DirectorJohn CarpenterStarsKeith GordonJohn StockwellAlexandra PaulA nerdish boy buys a strange car with an evil mind of its own and his nature starts to change to reflect it.This movie starts out decent, then fizzles out. The plot is a little too far-fetched to really be scarey.
- DirectorRon MaxwellStarsTatum O'NealKristy McNicholArmand AssanteTwo fifteen year-old girls from different sides of the tracks compete to see who will be the first to lose their virginity while at a summer camp.I saw this movie years ago, and all I remember was I didn't care for it. The plot seems more like something you would see in today's culture, not 1980. It touches on teenage girls and virginity at a summer camp.
- DirectorNeil JordanStarsAnnette BeningRobert Downey Jr.Katie SagonaA suburban housewife learns that she has a dreamworld connection to a serial murderer, and must stop him from killing again.Eerie in ways, but in other ways too proposterous to be taken seriously.
- DirectorJoseph L. MankiewiczStarsElizabeth TaylorKatharine HepburnMontgomery CliftA surgeon is assigned the case of a young woman whose aunt wants her lobotomized to cover up a family secret.Awful beyond words because of the way it is put forth, confusing and too dramatic. Hepburn, Montgomery and Taylor performed well, but the movie sucked. It was really about homosexuality, but they put it across in a way that was difficult to decipher. Most likely because it was a subject seldom talked about in 1959 unlike today.
- DirectorEthan CoenJoel CoenStarsBrad PittFrances McDormandGeorge ClooneyA disk containing mysterious information from a CIA agent ends up in the hands of two unscrupulous and daft gym employees who attempt to sell it.
- DirectorRyan MurphyStarsJulia RobertsJavier BardemRichard JenkinsA married woman realizes how unhappy her marriage really is, and that her life needs to go in a different direction. After a painful divorce, she takes off on a round-the-world journey to "find herself".I thought this was a little boring.
- DirectorIvan ReitmanStarsNatalie PortmanAshton KutcherKevin KlineA guy and girl try to keep their relationship strictly physical, but it's not long before they learn that they want something more.Too raunchy for my tastes, but people who enjoy this sort of humor will be satisfied.
- DirectorLone ScherfigStarsAnne HathawayJim SturgessPatricia ClarksonAfter spending the night together on the eve of their college graduation, Dexter and Emma are shown each year on the same date to see where they are in their lives. They are sometimes together, and sometimes not.The ending was wrong! The movie as a whole isn't worth a second watch by my opinion.
- DirectorRobert MulliganStarsAlan AldaEllen BurstynIvan BonarA married man and a married woman end up sleeping with each other, and decide to meet at the same place every year on the anniversary of their one night stand. As the years go by, they observe changes in each other and their relationship.The idea of this film was appalling to me. A lifelong affair that never becomes a committed relationship? I think I only watched it out of curiosity because a novel I was reading made references to it.
- DirectorMichael AptedStarsJodie FosterLiam NeesonNatasha RichardsonIn a remote woodland cabin, a small-town doctor discovers Nell - a beautiful young hermit-woman with many secrets.