The Dumbest Films from the 1980's
The 80’s were a pretty awful decade in my opinion. The Era is known for its crappy styles and atrociously lame music, not to mention bizarro fashion (like shoulder pads).
With a stupid era come stupid films from that era, and this list is full of those movies. So without further to do let's dive into this river of turd.
With a stupid era come stupid films from that era, and this list is full of those movies. So without further to do let's dive into this river of turd.
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- DirectorRobert GreenwaldStarsOlivia Newton-JohnGene KellyMichael BeckA struggling artist living in Los Angeles meets a girl who may hold the key to his happiness.This film killed off the disco era and anything that was remotely cool about it. This movie should be titled "Xanadon't"
- DirectorBarbara PeetersJimmy T. MurakamiStarsDoug McClureAnn TurkelVic MorrowHumanoid sea creatures start killing a fishing town's residents, and raping their women. It's up to the townsfolk and a visiting biologist to fight back and fend them off.
- DirectorMike HodgesStarsSam J. JonesMelody AndersonMax von SydowA football player and his friends travel to the planet Mongo and find themselves fighting the tyranny of Ming the Merciless to save Earth.Based on the 1930's comics of the same name this updated version shows that the Actors, Writers, and Director Mike Hodges didn't take this film very seriously, but at least it's enjoyable unlike the other movies on this list.
- DirectorBruce D. ClarkStarsEdward AlbertErin MoranRay WalstonA ragtag spaceship crew sent on a rescue mission encounter a formidable enemy, their worst fears projected by their own imaginations.A rip off of Alien
- DirectorHal NeedhamStarsBarry BostwickMichael BeckPersis KhambattaStory about a rapid deployment defense unit that is called into action whenever freedom is threatened.
- DirectorDon CoscarelliStarsMarc SingerTanya RobertsRip TornA sword-and-sorcery fantasy about a young man's search for revenge. Armed with supernatural powers, the handsome hero and his animal allies wage war against marauding forces.A rip off of Conan the Barbarian
- DirectorJuan Piquer SimónStarsChristopher GeorgeLynda Day GeorgeFrank BrañaThe co-eds of a Boston college campus are targeted by a mysterious killer who is creating a human jigsaw puzzle from their body parts.
- DirectorTommy Lee WallaceStarsTom AtkinsStacey NelkinDan O'HerlihyKids all over America want Silver Shamrock masks for Halloween. Doctor Daniel Challis seeks to uncover a plot by Silver Shamrock owner Conal Cochran.To be honest I kind of like this film but the story and plot in the film are very silly as well as the villains.
- DirectorRichard LesterStarsChristopher ReeveRichard PryorMargot KidderSynthetic kryptonite laced with tar splits Superman in two: good Clark Kent and bad Man of Steel.
- DirectorJoe AlvesStarsDennis QuaidBess ArmstrongSimon MacCorkindaleA giant thirty-five-foot shark becomes trapped in a SeaWorld theme park and it's up to the sons of police chief Brody to rescue everyone.
- DirectorHarry Bromley DavenportStarsPhilip SayerBernice StegersDanny BraininAn alien creature impregnates a woman who gives birth to a man who was abducted by aliens three years ago. The man reconnects with his wife and son for a sinister purpose.Its basally ET but with a psychopathic rapist for an Alien that impregnates a Woman which later give birth to a full grow man.
- DirectorSam FirstenbergStarsLucinda DickeyAdolfo QuinonesMichael ChambersA developer tries to bulldoze a community recreation center. The local breakdancers try to stop it.
- DirectorJohn MiliusStarsPatrick SwayzeC. Thomas HowellLea ThompsonIt is the dawn of World War III. In the west mountains of America, a group of teenagers band together to defend their town, and their country, from invading Soviet forces.This is more like an far right wing propaganda than an actual movie.
- DirectorRichard FleischerStarsArnold SchwarzeneggerGrace JonesOlivia d'AboConan leads a ragtag group of adventurers on a quest for a princess.
- DirectorJoel SilbergStarsLucinda DickeyAdolfo QuinonesMichael ChambersA struggling young jazz dancer meets up with two break-dancers. Together they become the sensation of the street crowds.
- DirectorJohn GuillerminStarsTanya RobertsTed WassDonovan ScottSheena grew up in the African wild, raised by a mystical witch woman. When her foster mother is framed for a murder Sheena is forced to flee, helped by her ability to talk to animals and her knowledge of the jungle.
- DirectorMichael HerzLloyd KaufmanStarsAndree MarandaMitch CohenJennifer BabtistTromaville has a monstrous new hero. The Toxic Avenger is born when meek mop boy Melvin falls into a vat of toxic waste. Now evildoers will have a lot to lose.
- DirectorThom EberhardtStarsCatherine Mary StewartKelli MaroneyRobert BeltranA comet wipes out most of life on Earth, leaving two Valley Girls fighting against cannibal zombies and a sinister group of scientists.
- DirectorBob ClarkSylvester StalloneDon ZimmermanStarsSylvester StalloneDolly PartonRichard FarnsworthA country music star must turn an obnoxious New York cabbie into a singer in order to win a bet.
- DirectorRichard FleischerStarsArnold SchwarzeneggerBrigitte NielsenSandahl BergmanThe fearless warrior Red Sonja sets out to avenge her family's murder and rid her kingdom from the tyrannical rule of evil Queen Gedren.
- DirectorTobe HooperStarsSteve RailsbackMathilda MayPeter FirthA race of space vampires arrives in London and infects the populace, beginning an apocalyptic descent into chaos.
- DirectorLarry CohenStarsMichael MoriartyAndrea MarcovicciGarrett MorrisA delicious, mysterious goo that oozes from the earth is marketed as the newest dessert sensation, but the tasty treat rots more than teeth when zombie-like snackers who only want to consume more of the strange substance at any cost begin infesting the world.
- DirectorWillard HuyckStarsLea ThompsonJeffrey JonesTim RobbinsA sarcastic humanoid duck is pulled from his homeworld to Earth where he must stop an alien invasion with the help of a nerdy scientist and a struggling female rock singer.
- DirectorStephen HerekStarsDee WallaceM. Emmet WalshBilly Green BushA group of small but vicious alien creatures called Crites escape from an alien prison transport vessel and land near a small farm town on earth, pursued by two shape-shifting bounty hunters.
- DirectorJohn GuillerminCharles McCrackenStarsBrian KerwinLinda HamiltonPeter ElliottKong falls from the twin towers and he appears to be alive. However, his heart is failing, so it's replaced with an artificial one. All is well until he senses that there's a female Kong somewhere out there and escapes wreaking havoc.
- DirectorRichard W. HainesLloyd KaufmanStarsJanelle BradyGil BrentonRobert PrichardThe pupils at a high school next to a nuclear power plant start acting and looking strange after buying contaminated drugs from a plant worker.
- DirectorGeorge P. CosmatosStarsSylvester StalloneBrigitte NielsenReni SantoniA tough-on-crime street cop must protect the only surviving witness to a strange murderous cult with far-reaching plans.
- DirectorTony ScottStarsTom CruiseTim RobbinsKelly McGillisAs students at the United States Navy's elite fighter weapons school compete to be best in the class, one daring young pilot learns a few things from a civilian instructor that are not taught in the classroom.American Bullsh*t at its finest! Also I should bring up the ending about how Tom Cruise spark World War 3.
An USA aircraft carrier is in hostile waters for no reason, the aircraft carrier spot six MiGs from unknown origins (possibly China or North Korea it's never explained) the US aircraft carrier decides to attack those MiGs without a formal declaration of war, leaving two of the six fighter MiGs alive. This creates a de facto state of war with the USA and the Nation that commanded those MiGs. - DirectorFred DekkerStarsJason LivelyTom AtkinsSteve MarshallAlien brain parasites, entering humans through the mouth, turn their host into a killing zombie. Some teenagers start to fight against them.
- DirectorSteve MinerStarsC. Thomas HowellRae Dawn ChongArye GrossTo achieve his dream of attending Harvard, a pampered teen poses as a young black man to receive a full scholarship.
- DirectorSidney J. FurieStarsChristopher ReeveGene HackmanMargot KidderThe Man of Steel crusades for nuclear disarmament and meets Lex Luthor's latest creation, Nuclear Man.This movie proves that Superman and the Cold War doesn't go hand to hand. Also the Villain in this movie is called "Nuclear Man" but he's power comes from the Sun, he should be called "Solar Man" as corny as that sounds.
- DirectorJoseph SargentStarsLorraine GaryLance GuestMario Van PeeblesChief Brody's widow believes that her family is deliberately being targeted by another shark in search of revenge.I think by this time the Jaws franchise jump the shark.
- DirectorJackie KongStarsRick BurksCarl CrewRoger DauerTwo brothers are entrusted by their uncle to uphold the ritualistic cannibalism of the ancient cult of Sheetar. In order to do so, they have to prepare a feast of sacrifice for the resurrection of their goddess.
- DirectorJ. Michael MuroStarsMike LackeyBill ChepilVic NotoA liquor store owner sells alcoholic beverages to homeless people, unaware of what the bottles actually contain: toxic brew.
- DirectorLee HarryStarsEric FreemanJames NewmanElizabeth KaitanThe now-adult Ricky talks to a psychiatrist about how he became a murderer after his brother, Billy, died, which leads back to Mother Superior.
- DirectorMenahem GolanStarsSylvester StalloneRobert LoggiaSusan BlakelyTough trucker Lincoln Hawk is determined to win back his son and triumph at the world arm wrestling championships.
- DirectorRoger DonaldsonStarsTom CruiseBryan BrownElisabeth ShueA talented New York City bartender takes a job at a bar in Jamaica and falls in love.
- DirectorStewart RaffillStarsChristine EbersoleJonathan WardTina CasparyAn alien trying to escape from NASA is befriended by a wheelchair-bound boy.A rip off of ET
- DirectorCullen BlaineStarsMargaret TriggRichard GessweinJayne SmithRobotic Officer Tactical Operation Research. A prototype robot intended for crime combat escapes from the development lab and goes on a killing rampage.
- DirectorMichael HerzLloyd KaufmanStarsRon FazioPhoebe LegereJohn AltamuraToxie finds he has nothing to do as a superhero, as he has ridden his city of evil. He decides to go to work for a major corporation, which he discovers may be the evilest of all his adversaries.
- DirectorThomas J. WrightStarsHulk HoganJoan SeveranceKurt FullerA TV-network boss pits a wrestler called Zeus against a wrestler called Rip in a wrestling match.
- DirectorMichael HerzLloyd KaufmanStarsRon FazioJohn AltamuraPhoebe LegereThe Toxic Avenger is tricked into traveling to Tokyo to search for his estranged father, leaving Tromaville open to complete domination by an evil corporation.