Nero's Mistress (1956) Poster

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6/10
Nero's Mistress (Steno, 1956) **1/2
Bunuel19767 March 2008
As was the case with TWO NIGHTS WITH CLEOPATRA (1953), this Alberto Sordi vehicle lampoons the then-affluent peplum genre; helmed by another comedy specialist, it's a superior effort – with the star's particular brand of fooling (a mix of pompousness and naïveté) somewhat better suited this time around to the requirements of his role, that of notorious music-loving and mad Roman Emperor Nero.

Besides, the film has an eclectic – and rather surprising – mix of talents, on both sides of the camera: in fact, it co-stars Vittorio De Sica (a great director but also a wonderful actor) as Seneca, Gloria Swanson (her renowned comeback in SUNSET BOULEVARD [1950], alas, didn't lead to much) as Agrippina – Nero's fearsome and domineering mother, Brigitte Bardot (on the verge of becoming an international sex symbol) as a rather ordinary-looking Poppea, and even future Hammer leading lady Barbara Shelley – though not in a prominent role, presumably, as one of the innumerable maidens at Nero's palace; and, then, there's horrormeisters Mario Bava and Lucio Fulci – here in the capacity of cinematographer and assistant director respectively!

The film manages to be quite engaging and stylish (no wonder, given Bava's involvement)…even if it was rather a chore to watch, since the Italian TV channel which showed it has been suffering from a horrendous reception for some time! The simple plot involves Agrippina's unannounced arrival at Nero's resting quarters to verify rumors of his liaison with Poppea; Seneca, Nero's adviser, is assigned by the Emperor the task of stalling her at every turn…even if he has to marry her to do so! Of course, Nero is eager to flaunt his alleged musical genius and the bevy of associates and conspirators enclosed within the palace boldly hisses or meekly applauds his would-be compositions; at the end, distressed by rejection (especially by those closest to him) leads him to set the empire's capital on fire...
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5/10
Carry on, Claudians, Italian Style...
mark.waltz2 September 2016
Warning: Spoilers
Don't expect to hear the voice of the legendary Gloria Swanson in this farcical view of the last of the original Roman empire dynasty. The Claudians, seriously documented in the brilliant BBC miniseries "I Claudius" gets a follow-up with this Italian farce. If you recall, in the television adaption of Robert Graves' classic novel, Claudius was poisoned by his evil wife, Aggrapina and her son, Nero. Claudius foresaw the end of his family's reign and gladly ate the poisoned mushrooms fed to him by his wife, as evil as any of the women who proceeded her. That's the part Swanson plays, and she's a sight to behold.

Alberto Sordi is the frivolous Nero, as mad as his uncle Caligula, cheery but irresponsible, and involved with the beguiling Pompea (Bridgette Bardot) much to his mother's displeasure. I couldn't tell if she was more upset over his putting snakes in her bed (for which she carries a mongoose around) or his choice of bed-mates. This is a bit of a history lesson, mentioning everybody going back to the mother of the nation, Aggrapina's great grandmother, Livia. As they recapped the family history, I couldn't help but laugh in recollection.

This certainly is gorgeous to look at, every detail of it as you elaborate as any of the biblical epics Hollywood was doing with extremely high budgets at the same time. However, the acting within the Italian dubbing, I couldn't properly accept as believable for Swanson's character. A lot of the Roman royalty lusts for excesses is right on, and a musical performance by Sordi with fat male children backing him up as chorus boys seems to have influenced the creators of the disastrous "Caligula".

It also seems influenced by the many overstuffed operas, although I think this is closer to Mozart's burlesque period than any of the great writers of opera's golden age. I am certainly glad that I sought this out both for the historical view (if not the method in which it was presented) and for Swanson's presence. Call this one, "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to Rome's Destruction". Or even better, "How to Murder your Mother while she murders your mistress".
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5/10
The Secrets of the Roman Empire
Tweetienator27 August 2022
A colorful parody or persiflage on the Roman Empire, made with some production value and some known actors - Barbara Shelley, Gloria Swanson and Bridget Bardot among some known Italian actors like Vittorio De Sica or Alberto Sordi (at least if you know a tiny bit of Italian movies). Nero's Mistress will be an entertaining ride - if the kind of humor provided strikes you, if not, you won't enjoy this ride. For sure Nero's Mistress aka Mio figlio Nerone does not play in the same league as the immortal and ueber-delicious Monty Python's Life of Brian (1979), but this one was made decades before that masterpiece.
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7/10
A factual comedy with the following story line: Mamma will always be Mamma! Even if she is Nero's Mamma.
Uberhamster27 June 2010
Nero's Big Weekend / Mero's Mistress / Mio Figlio Nerone

Nero is normally used as a bad guy opposite a (comic) hero, but here he is himself at the centre of the story. Tension rises when his mother Agrippina visits him in his seaside villa and tries to coerce him into tending to state affairs. She has to rival with Seneca and Poppea who try to manipulate him in the opposite direction. The latter two try to have her murdered but she seems to be immortal. Meanwhile, Nero has taken to singing. An international cast in a unique comedy. I do not mean that it is an all-time masterpiece. Rather, it is a strangely factual comedy. The attempts at Agrippina's life are all taken literally from the writings of Suetonius. All they did was make it all happen in one weekend. Somehow, you get the feeling this is almost exactly what history was like.

The movie was dubbed in several languages. The German dub or the UK version are unavailable. The US version puts more emphasis on Poppea than on Agrippina, but what is worse, it is missing the final punchline - shame! Try the French or the Italian version, which are anyway the only ones available on DVD (as of 2010). English subtitles have appeared on the internet.
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7/10
Exquisite spoof of Roman Civilization
Johnny B26 October 1998
The epoch of the Roman Empire has inspired many film makers to produce movies set in this age. This is one that'll never be matched. I do not mean that it is of a superb quality, but it stands out as being one of the very few films that make fun of this civilization. The storyline is quite thin - everyone makes his best to stop Nero from singing. Everyone tries to kill everyone: Nero tries to kill his mother Agrippina, Agrippina tries to kill Seneca and Poppea, these two in turn try to kill her too. Agrippina's trials always fail to work - the others' though, work every time. They put vipers in her bed, they give her poison to drink, they drop ceilings on her bed, they flood the ship on which she is travelling. But each time she always appears back as a demon from hell unable to die. Her appearance after each attempt is ghastly, especially the one after Nero orders her ship to be drowned - she appears in the palace dresses in a pale blue dress with lightning flashing behind her. Gloria Swanson is just about the best thing is this film. Her acting is superb as the plotting mother of the mad emperor. The charm she had in the 1920s is still present as late as 1956. Alberto Sordi is fine as the childish mad emperor, Vittorio de Sica is funny as the all-sapient Seneca while Brigitte Bardot fits excellently as the bitchy, wealth-seeking Poppea. All in all it is a fine comedy set in ancient times, bound to be enjoyed by those who watch it.
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Roman antics.
ItalianGerry23 May 2004
A very silly movie indeed. A spoof of Nero and ancient Rome. I loved Nero's elegiac song in the palace court, surrounded by the chubbykin cherubs. Nero to mamma Agrippina, "How beautiful you are," he says, as he plans to kill her and others who annoy him or stand in his way in this movie where everybody seems to have homicide on their minds and snakes in their hands. Nero's philosophy: "I have more important things than politics. I have to sing." Seneca turns the criticism of Nero's singing like a dog into a laudatory affirmation.

This is all Marx Brothers mayhem, with the weirdest casting imaginable: Alberto Sordi as the demented Nero (perfect), Gloria Swanson as mom Agrippina (seething), Brigitte Bardot as gold-digger Poppea (lusty), Vittorio De Sica as Seneca (cautiously two-faced). The movie's release in America in a dubbed version was minimal, but it's really quite enjoyable.
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6/10
Italian Comedy with Alberto SORDI, Gloria SWANSON and Brigitte BARDOT
ZeddaZogenau6 April 2024
This somewhat outdated comedy from Italy somewhat anticipates the coming boom in Italian sword and sandal films. The well-known stories about the crazy Roman Emperor Nero are told. The topic is still very popular, as can be seen impressively in the current film SENECA by Robert SCHWENTKE.

This film by Stefano VANZINA /STENO (PLATTFOOT with Bud SPENCER) impresses with colorful images (on camera: Mario BAVA!!!) and excellent actors. Alberto SORDI (GOLDEN GLOBE for IL DIAVOLO / AMORE IN STOCKHOLM) can be seen as Emperor Nero. Vittorio De SICA (ACADEMY AWARD nomination for A FAREWELL TO ARMS) portrays the poet Seneca. As a big Hollywood surprise, Gloria SWANSON (ACADEMY AWARD nomination for SUNSET BOULEVARD, among others) plays the emperor mother Agrippina. This cast is truly a show! But the main eye-catcher is of course the very young BAMBI AWARD winner Brigitte BARDOT, who as Poppäa gets to bathe beautifully in donkey milk. Mon Dieu! The BB!

The actors are probably also the ones who made it possible for the global streaming service NETFLIX to bring this Italian classic out of obscurity. It doesn't hurt to look!
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10/10
LOVE HER!!
boxer507330 November 2004
MS SWANSON is wonderful!!--She knows she's laying it on and lays it on great!! Today--when actresses can work about as long as the guys--she could have been a great comic actress, and really, was, she was an amazing woman!! When she made this movie, the stereotype of the over dramatic former silent film star actress was, of course, already firmly established. Instead of fighting against this stereotype, just as in SUNSET BOULEVARD, she plays it to the hilt.This suits the Marx Brothers style perfectly. Though in her late fifties at the time of this filming, she is still a very beautiful woman. Also, she had a shape,not just skin and bone like most actresses now days.
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6/10
Silly Nero and family
kosmasp20 July 2021
But while there is slapstick, it sometimes feels like it is just a "normal" movie ... and not the completely out there comedy it actually is. Maybe that is because of me not being fluent in Italian and certain things being lost in translation ... or maybe the mood and flow of the movie is actually all over the place.

Having said that, the comedy does work if you don't expect much. The actors are really good and they sort of elevate an otherwise quite subpar movie I'd say ... it is a matter of taste (even if most would say bad taste)
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charming
Kirpianuscus10 February 2023
A very easy portrait of episodes of Nero reign. The names of actors are the basic motif to see it. But the acting is very nice, seductive , the irony is well crafted and Alberto Sordi as immature emperor is just admirable.

A comedy without high ambitions, giving not exactly revelation but good open window to the parody of Italian sandals and sand films , for a beautiful self irony of Gloria Swanson and for the young Brigitte Bardot proposing a lovely Poppea. And, not the last Vittorio De Sica as a Seneca proposing the joy of acting.

In short, a charming film for the dose of irony, for remind of cliches about Nero and for the sparkles about Nero proposed, in Quo Vadis, by Sienkievicz and ...Peter Ustinov.
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8/10
Good historical analysis
AnalyticalFilmCritic3 April 2024
This Italian-French film from 1956 may seem kitsch, but actually is a good historical analysis of the persons. The shot of the very important historical source Tacitus's Annales in the beginning already suggests a deeper layer to the film.

The insane situation of everybody plotting to kill each other was something that actually occured in the Roman Empire.

I have read many of the letters to Lucilius by Seneca the Younger, and I think this film gives a sharp, albeit slightly satircal, analysis of Seneca's character. In his letters he often writes about being happy while living in poverty and not needing luxury, but he himself lived a luxurious life as Nero's advisor. His philosophy is also pretty well incorporated as well as can be in a comedy.

Also the character of Nero is played well, and probably not even exaggerated, Nero was actually dangerously crazy and obsessed with performing music and theater.

Brigitte Bardot is gorgeous of course. According to Tacitus her character Poppaea did turn Nero against his mother Agrippina.

The scenery and stage of the film is also beautiful.
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