Look Back in Anger (1959)

Mary Ure: Alison Porter

Photos 

Quotes 

• Alison Porter : [on bears and squirrels]  Its sort of a silly symphony for people who can't bear the pain of being human any longer.

• Alison Porter : I suppose none of this could ever really have worked. I do love you, Jimmy, I shall never love anyone as I love you. But I can't go on. I can't take part in all this suffering, I can't.

  Jimmy Porter : It's no good fooling about with love, you know. You can't fall into it like a soft job without dirtying up your hands. It takes muscle and guts. If you can't bear the thought of messing up your nice tidy soul, you better give up the whole idea of life and become a saint, because you'll never make it as a human being. It's either this world... or the next.

• Jimmy Porter : I'm sorry.

  Alison Porter : Get out.

  Jimmy Porter : You think I did it on purpose?

  Alison Porter : Clear out of my sight!

• Jimmy Porter : I didn't know about the baby. I don't exactly relish the idea of pain and suffering but it wasn't my first loss you know.

  Alison Porter : It was mine.

• Alison Porter : I don't think I want anything more to do with love. Not any more, I can't take it on.

• Cliff Lewis : You're a brave girl.

  Alison Porter : I don't feel very brave Cliff, I really don't. I don't think I can take much more. I feel rather sick.

• Alison Porter : I keep looking back as far as I remember. I can't think what it was like to feel young, really young. Jimmy said the same thing to me the other day and I pretended not to be listening, because I thought it would hurt him, I suppose. But I knew just what he meant. Oh I suppose it would've been so easy to say "Oh yes darling, I know what you mean, I know how you're feeling." It's these easy things that seem to be so impossible with us.

• Doctor : What does your husband do, what's his profession?

  Alison Porter : He runs a sweet stall at the market.

  Doctor : I thought you said he's been to university.

• Helena Charles : Does he drink?

  Alison Porter : He's not an alcoholic, if that's what you mean.

  Helena Charles : Oh, that trumpet! It's almost as if he wanted to kill someone and me in particular. I've never seen such hatred in someone's eyes before, it's horrifying... and slightly exciting.

• Helena Charles : Tell me, why did you...?

  Alison Porter : Marry him? Oh there must be about six different answers. I met him at a party. He'd come there on his bicycle and there was oil on his jacket. It had been such a lovely day. Everything about him seemed to burn: his face, the edges of his hair glistened. His eyes were so blue and full of sun.

  Helena Charles : So you took him on.

  Alison Porter : There never seemed to be any choice.

• Helena Charles : Did he love you?

  Alison Porter : A howl of outrage went up from my family.

  Helena Charles : Well, you can see their point.

  Alison Porter : And that made up his mind, he had to marry me.

• Alison Porter : You know what he said about mummy, he said she was an overfed, overprivileged old cow.

  Colonel Redfern : I see, and what did he say about me?

  Alison Porter : He doesn't seem to mind you, in fact I think he rather likes you. Poor old daddy, just one of those sturdy plants left over from the Edwardian era wondering why the sun doesn't shine any more.

  Colonel Redfern : Why did you have to meet this young man?

  Alison Porter : Oh daddy, please don't put me on trial now. I've been on trial every day and night for the past two years.

  Colonel Redfern : But why you, my daughter?

• Jimmy Porter : I know I'm a lost cause, but I thought if you loved me it didn't really matter.

  Alison Porter : It does matter. I was wrong. I don't want to be neutral, I want to be a lost cause. Don't you understand? It's gone, that helpless human being inside my body. I thought it was so safe and secure in there', but its gone. All I wanted was to die. I was in pain and all I could think about was you and what I'd lost.

• Jimmy Porter : You ever seen anybody die?

  Alison Porter : No, I haven't.

  Jimmy Porter : For 12 months, I watched my father die when I was ten years old. He'd come back from the war in Spain, you see. All my mother could think was that she was married to somebody who was on the... on the wrong side in all things. Perhaps she pitied him. I was the only one who cared. Hour upon hour... I sat in that little room. And he would talk, you know. Pour out all that was left of his life to a small, frightened boy who could barely understand half of what he said. All I could feel was the despair, and the bitterness, the sweet, sickly smell of a dying man. See, I learned at an early age what it is to be angry... Angry. Helpless.

• Colonel Redfern : I think you take after me my dear, you like to sit on the fence. Its comfortable and more peaceful.

  Alison Porter : Sitting on the fence? I married him, didn't I?

• Jimmy Porter : Look down your nose at her once more...

  Alison Porter : I just couldn't bear to be touched.

  Jimmy Porter : You made that perfectly plain.

• Jimmy Porter : What friend?

  Alison Porter : Helena Charles, I meant to say, she telephoned, she's playing at the theatre next week.

  Jimmy Porter : I see, she said "Can I come over?" and you said, "My husband Jimmy, if you'll pardon my using such a dirty word, will be delighted to see you, he'll kick your teeth in."

• Jimmy Porter : What about you, do you want to come?

  Alison Porter : I'm going out with Helena.

  Alison Porter : That's not a direction, it's an affliction.

• Jimmy Porter : She's taken you with her and you're so bloody wet you've let her do it.

  Alison Porter : All I want is a little peace.