Sex and the Single Girl (1964)

Tony Curtis: Bob Weston

Photos 

Quotes 

• Frank Luther Broderick : What do you call it when you hate the woman you love?

  Bob Weston : A wife.

• Bob Weston : Gretchen, let me ask you something. If you were as pure as the driven snow...

  Gretchen : Honey, I can't remember that far back.

• Helen Gurley Brown : Oh, no, no, no. Don't be frightened. Are you really so bashful with her?

  Bob Weston : [pretending to be Frank Broderick]  I'm even bashful with you.

  Helen Gurley Brown : Well, there's no need to be. See, we're holding hands and nothing is happening.

  Bob Weston : Something is happening.

  Helen Gurley Brown : You're gaining confidence and that's what's happening.

  Bob Weston : I'm gaining confidence and that's what's happening.

• Bob Weston : Beat it!

  Bum : Be nice to me, I'm a bum.

• Bob Weston : I've got an idea for a follow-up on that kid, that Dr. Helen Brown, that'll blast every other magazine right off the news stands! It's a personal exposé right from her own lips! Does she or doesn't she? Either way it's a crummy story.

• Bob Weston : You call me darling again and I'm going to send you to Readers Digest.

  Susan : Dr. Helen Brown says that being properly aggressive a girl can land any man she wants to!

  Bob Weston : Well, you're not a girl. You're a secretary!

• Bob Weston : [talking about Dr. Brown]  I'll bet you this kid has been giving flying lessons and she's never been off the ground!

• Bob Weston : What a mouth on that girl!

• Bob Weston : I'd like to be able to get to that broad. I need a plan! Something that's vicious, low, filthy and dirty!

  Susan : Well, you'll think of something, Angel.

• Bob Weston : Gretchen, you read this book, "Sex and the Single Girl," right? Tell me, what do you think of this Helen Gurley Brown. Is she really on the level?

  Gretchen : I don't know, honey. I don't think I've ever lived like a single girl.

• Helen Gurley Brown : Mr. Broderick, when did all this jealousy start?

  Bob Weston : [pretending to be Frank Broderick]  On our honeymoon. Even before our honeymoon, I guess. She knows I used to play around a lot before we were married.

  Helen Gurley Brown : How does she know?

  Bob Weston : She was the one I used to play around a lot with.

• Helen Gurley Brown : You're a very good looking man, Mr. Broderick.

  Bob Weston : [pretending to be Frank Broderick]  You're a very beautiful girl, Dr. Brown.

• Bob Weston : [pretending to be Frank Broderick]  She'd hit the ceiling if she thought you and me were sitting here alone. You know what she'd figure? She'd figure a broad as pretty as you has *got* to be on the make.

• Bob Weston : [pretending to be Frank Broderick]  Please, Doctor, don't misunderstand me. When I talk about you or any other girl, it's only as a customer. You see, I make ladies stockings and that's all I care about - is business. When I look at a woman's legs - may I see your legs, please? See, when I look at a woman's legs, I mean, beautiful.

  Helen Gurley Brown : Thank you.

  Bob Weston : But, when I look at a woman's legs, I look at them because I have to, not because I particularly want to, you know. I mean, what good is a casing without the sausage inside?

• Bob Weston : [pretending to be Frank Broderick]  When I get anxious, I get scared. Because I'm scared, I get inadequate. And, because I'm inadequate, she thinks - she thinks I'm with other women. She - doesn't think that I'm inadequate. She just thinks I'm tired.

• Gretchen : Anniversaries like these always leave me with a strange kind of longing.

  Bob Weston : For marriage.

  Gretchen : Oh, no, honey! I wouldn't give up my career for marriage, kids or happiness.

  Bob Weston : Good girl, good girl!

• Helen Gurley Brown : Are you attracted to me?

  Bob Weston : [pretending to be Frank Broderick]  Oh, yes, Dr. Brown. I am, I am, I am.

• George : You wouldn't let the truth stand in the way of a good story, would you?

  Bob Weston : George, you don't have to tell me anything about ethics.

• Bob Weston : That way she'll be with you all day long and she'll be able to see for herself that you're not fooling around with - any other - chicks.

• Helen Gurley Brown : I hope you don't feel odd or anything because you're wearing a woman's robe.

  Bob Weston : [pretending to be Frank Broderick]  Oh, no! Not at all! In fact, I was thinking I look just like - eh - Jack Lemmon did in that movie where he dressed up like a girl. Remember?

• Bob Weston : [pretending to be Frank Broderick]  Sylvia never says nice things to me. Maybe that's why I don't have the confidence.

  Helen Gurley Brown : Well, I'm gonna give you the confidence.

• Helen Gurley Brown : Now, one of the many ways to control a woman is through the power of touch. Give me your hand. Holding a woman's - or a man's - hand, in a gentle, yet, firm and caressing way says many, many things.

  Bob Weston : [pretending to be Frank Broderick]  I can hear them now.

• Helen Gurley Brown : There are certain erogenous areas of the body. The back and sides of the neck, for example. Do not get discouraged if you get no response from me. My neck is a dead area. However, its very much alive in over 90% of all women. I've made a statistical study.

  Bob Weston : [pretending to be Frank Broderick]  You make many statistical studies, don't you, Doctor?

  Helen Gurley Brown : Oh, yes. Yes I do. Oh, yes! Kissing the ear is very helpful too. Oh, yes. I made up my mind very early that I was gonna learn all I could about love and marriage *before* I made my mistakes. Now, switch over to the other ear. By this time, in most cases, that other ear will just be begging for attention!

• Helen Gurley Brown : Mr. Broderick, bear in mind that it's not me you're touching, but...

  Bob Weston : [pretending to be Frank Broderick]  Sylvia.

  Bob Weston : Yes.

  Helen Gurley Brown : Now, get close to me and begin caressing me. And if I don't respond - if I don't respond, its because I have this - dead area and I never feel - Oh, it's awfully warm in here! Isn't it, Mr. Broderick?

  Bob Weston : No, it's very bright.

  Helen Gurley Brown : Bright? All the lights are out? Mmmm. Yes, that's - you're very good, Mr. Broderick. You're doing fine! Just doing - fine.

• Bob Weston : I'm still the dirtiest louse in the publishing business!

• Bob Weston : In one week, I'll prove to you amateurs that I've earned my reputation and prove that every single filthy, dirty lie, that you've ever heard about me - is true!

• Gretchen : This is my big chance! It might mean stardom and lots of money. Look, honey, Irving has been trying to get this interview for months. He's been following the Producer around - why, he's even taken steam baths for me!

  Bob Weston : Why is he taking steam baths for you?

  Gretchen : Because the Producer takes them.

• Gretchen : I'm sorry Bob, but, when fame knocks you should answer.

  Bob Weston : Eh, that's opportunity.

  Gretchen : Well, whatever it is, I'm answering.

• Bob Weston : [walks into his office and sees Susan laying down on the couch with Sylvester kissing her]  Susan, after all the years you've been my Secretary - well, at least you could stop while I'm talking to you!

  Sylvester : Weston, get out! It's not your office any more, but mine! This is my Secretary!

  Bob Weston : Poor, poor Sylvester. I taught you every rotten thing you know.

  Sylvester : Yeah, look what it's got me. Your office, your job, your Secretary, even your clothes! While, you, Weston - you're all finished!

• Rudy : [Helen lightly slaps Bob]  Hot dog, what a sexy slap! What are you trying to do discourage him or satisfy yourself?

  Helen Gurley Brown : I won't be dominated by any man!

  Gretchen : [to Rudy]  I'd gladly be dominated by *any* man!

  Bob Weston : [to Helen]  Is that what you think I'm trying to do? Dominate you? Well, I never dug a chick like you anyway! Thanks for turning me down!

• Helen Gurley Brown : If I'm giving up my practice to become your wife and you've lost your job, then how will you support me after the honeymoon?

  Bob Weston : I've got a better job - with "Dirt" magazine!