- Luisa (segment "La telefonata"): I was in the kitchen making coffee. Right? I bent down to get the cups and at that moment Giorgio came in. And he did - I admit that he gave me a little slap.
- Luisa (segment "La telefonata"): Believe me, that girl over there, that Armenia is so common. Enormous hips and vulgar. You wouldn't believe. You've never seen such heavy legs, honestly.
- Luisa (segment "La telefonata"): No, you're mistaken! Do you think we do such things in a kitchen? Mamma Mia! And your kitchen too?
- Luisa (segment "La telefonata"): She's not the kind of girl Giorgio would pay attention to. Because she's vulgar and the one thing he can't stand is vulgarity. After all, he hardly had any experience before we got married. In some ways he's so innocent.
- Luisa (segment "La telefonata"): She must be a nymphomaniac, sure! I've got to tell you this. A man knocked on her door, he was selling books. She came to the door in her negligee. Her neighbor heard her say, "Isn't it hot today? Terrible!" And he said, "Don't let me stop you from doing what you were doing." Then she took off the negligee. She didn't have a stitch on!
- Ulla (segment "Il trattato di eugenetica"): I must get an Italian who's perfect. And you are just not perfect. Sorry, Valerio, but you aren't.
- Valerio (segment "Il trattato di eugenetica"): No?
- Ulla (segment "Il trattato di eugenetica"): I want a baby to take back home. I have a job and my freedom. I don't want a man to tie me down. I want the father of my child to be the perfect Latin male.
- Massimo (segment "Il trattato di eugenetica"): I'm a bit excited, like my car. If the motor is cold, it can't start.
- Valerio (segment "Il trattato di eugenetica"): That's right. Come here to me. What a body! You're beautiful!
- Ulla (segment "Il trattato di eugenetica"): I know. But, you're sweet to tell me.
- Massimo (segment "Il trattato di eugenetica"): You funny girl! You like pornography. Is that it?
- Ulla (segment "Il trattato di eugenetica"): It's not pornography. It show you a system to have perfect babies.
- Massimo (segment "Il trattato di eugenetica"): How come nobody needed a system before? They always had babies. I suppose we Italians are old-fashioned.
- Valerio (segment "Il trattato di eugenetica"): Ulla, the car is here, ready for you. You wanted to go to Tivoli. Let's go and have fun! I won't take away your freedom, you can find all the men you want. We'll measure their legs, intelligence, ear lobes, whatever you want.
- Giovanna (segment "La minestra"): It's been years since we made love. What can I do? I'm still young. I want to enjoy life!
- Giovanna (segment "La minestra"): I'm a married woman. And I want you to respect me. Only, when you're near... But, it's not just physical pleasure I want. I need more. Is that unusual? I want to be loved by someone. Don't you believe me?
- Hotel Manager: I don't have any rooms.
- Beatrice (segment "Monsignor Cupido"): Put them in yours. Then you can sleep with your wife again.
- Hotel Manager: You're my wife after all. Pull down your skirt, it's indecent.
- Vincenzo (segment "Monsignor Cupido"): I've gone crazy.
- Monsignor Arendi (segment "Monsignor Cupido"): Crazy?
- Vincenzo (segment "Monsignor Cupido"): Crazy. Crazy. I don't mean like an idiot or a fool. I'm a maniac, but it's sexual, uncle.
- Monsignor Arendi (segment "Monsignor Cupido"): A sexual maniac?
- Monsignor Arendi (segment "Monsignor Cupido"): What has Vincenzo done to you?
- Beatrice (segment "Monsignor Cupido"): He molests, he persecutes me.
- Monsignor Arendi (segment "Monsignor Cupido"): Persecutes you? Vincenzo?
- Beatrice (segment "Monsignor Cupido"): With his eyes, up to now. Since you arrived, he has never taken his eyes off my body.
- Monsignor Arendi (segment "Monsignor Cupido"): No, he's just a boy, Vicenzo. No. No, no, no, my dear, don't be silly! This is just your imagination.
- Beatrice (segment "Monsignor Cupido"): Imagination, monsignore? He undresses me in his mind. He goes around stripping me. Sorry, but I had to explain to you. It's obscene. He winks at me. He's fresher each day. That pig! Sometimes I start going up a staircase, I look down and...
- Beatrice (segment "Monsignor Cupido"): [naked, on the bed, Vincenzo rushes in, she slaps him] Stupid!
- Luisa (segment "La telefonata"): Did you tell her anything smutty?
- Giorgio (segment "La telefonata"): Me?
- Ulla (segment "Il trattato di eugenetica"): I can't consider relations with you until you are tired.
- Massimo (segment "Il trattato di eu4genetica"): But, I am tired! Tired of waiting!
- [first lines]
- Giorgio (segment "La telefonata"): Luisa, yes.
- Luisa (segment "La telefonata"): Oh, no, Giorgio! Please let me be! We just had lunch, we'll get indigestion! Besides I don't want to. It's too early. Just let me read, will you?
- Giorgio (segment "La telefonata"): Uffa!