Superman (1978)

Valerie Perrine: Eve Teschmacher

Photos 

Quotes 

• Miss Teschmacher : It's too good to be true. He's 6' 4", has black hair, blue eyes, doesn't drink, doesn't smoke, and tells the truth.

  Lex Luthor : Miss Teschmacher, some people can read "War and Peace" and come away thinking it's a simple adventure story. Others can read the ingredients on a chewing gum wrapper and unlock the secrets of the universe.

  Miss Teschmacher : Lex, what has chewing gum got to do with the secrets of the universe?

• Miss Teschmacher : Why is it I can't get it on with the good guys?

• [after Luthor has explained his master plan to Superman] 

  Lex Luthor , Superman : Well. What do you think, "Supe", baby? Interesting?

  Superman : Well, your theory's quite impressive, Luthor.

  Lex Luthor : [to Otis]  Otis, would you go to the viewing room, please?

  [Otis departs] 

  Superman : But as for the rest, it's nothing but a sick fantasy.

  Lex Luthor : [chuckles]  Fantasy? No, no. It's *history*. It's *happening*, Superman.

  [screams] 

  Lex Luthor : Miss Teschmacher!

  [She enters] 

  Miss Teschmacher : Yes, Lex?

  Lex Luthor : [without turning to look at her]  Where's the rocket now?

  Miss Teschmacher : It's going like a bat over the Grand Canyon! So's the other one.

  Superman : [concerned]  The other one? There's two of them?

  [Luthor snaps his fingers at Eve, and she departs as well as he sits on a lead-lined trunk] 

  Lex Luthor : Yes, Superman. Double jeopardy. Even you with your great speed couldn't stop both of them. While I, on the other hand, could stop them with my detonator.

  [Superman crosses to Luthor, grabs him by the shirt and coat, lifts him up high] 

  Superman : Alright, Luthor, where is it? Where's that detonator?

  [Superman drops Luthor and begins scanning the room with his X-Ray vision. He checks out the safe and the desk but finds nothing. He then turns and sees the lead-lined trunk Luthor is sitting on] 

  Superman : You diseased maniac! Did you really think you could hide it from me by encasing it in lead?

  [He tosses Luthor off the trunk and onto the couch behind him] 

  Superman : I'll mold this box into your prison bars!

  Lex Luthor : [faux warning]  Don't touch that!

  [Superman dismisses the warning, opens the trunk and finds a glowing, green rock with a chain attached around it. He then looks pale and weak] 

  Lex Luthor : [smiling victoriously; chuckling]  I told ya. It's kryptonite, Superman. A little piece of the rock you were born on. I've spared no expense to make you feel right at home.

  [Luthor gets up, pulls the rock out of the box by the chain, Superman desperately tries to raise his arm to shield himself from the rays] 

  Lex Luthor : You were great in your day, Superman. But it just stands to reason. When it came time to cash in your chips, this old... diseased maniac... would be your banker. Mind over muscle.

  [Superman is trying to slide himself along the wall when Luthor finally places the chain around Superman's neck] 

  Superman : [weakly]  You... don't even care... where the other missile's headed, do you?

  Lex Luthor : Certainly, I do! I know exactly where it's headed. Hackensack, New Jersey.

  [Luthor pushes Superman over the crumbled railing bordering the office portion of his complex. He falls into the pool below] 

  Lex Luthor : [gleeful]  I have to leave you now. No hard feelings. We all have our little faults. Mine's in California.

• Superman : Why did... why did you kiss me first?

  Miss Teschmacher : I didn't think you'd let me later.

• Lex Luthor : Look at that overgrown boy scout, Miss Teschmacher. Tell me what you see.

  Miss Teschmacher : Cuteness... Dimples.

  Lex Luthor : You like cuteness, huh? You like dimples? I'll give you dimples.

  [He turns machine guns on Superman, who isn't even fazed] 

  Lex Luthor : The pressure is still on you, Superman. You know what they say - "If you can't stand the heat, get out of the tunnel".

  [He turns flamethrowers on Superman, who still isn't fazed] 

  Lex Luthor : This is your last chance, Superman. Why don't you do yourself a favor, and take a chill pill?

  [He freezes Superman solid, but the Man of Steel breaks free] 

• Lex Luthor : Miss Teschmacher, when I was six years old my father said to me...

  Miss Teschmacher : "Get out!"

  Lex Luthor : [laughing]  Before that. He said, "Son, stocks may rise and fall, utilities and transportation systems may collapse. People are no damn good, but they will always need land and they will pay through the nose to get it! Remember," my father said...

  Otis : "... land."

  Lex Luthor : Right. It's a pity he couldn't see from such humble beginnings how I've created this empire.

  Miss Teschmacher : An empire? This?

  Lex Luthor : Miss Teschmacher, how many girls do you know who have a Park Avenue address like this one?

  Miss Teschmacher : [sarcastically]  A Park Avenue address? Two hundred feet below?

  Lex Luthor : Do you realize what people are shelling out up there, for a few miserable rooms off a common elevator?

  Lex Luthor , Otis : What more could anyone ask?

  Miss Teschmacher : Sunshine? A night on the town instead of under it?

• Miss Teschmacher : It's too good to be true! He's 6-4, has black hair, blue eyes, doesn't drink, doesn't smoke, and tells the truth!

• Lex Luthor : [DELETED SCENE: at his underground manor, Luthor is playing the piano and singing]  "You must've been a beautiful baby, you must've been a wonderful child; when you were only startin' to go to kindergarten, you must've drove the little boys wild; And when it came to winning blue ribbons, you must've shown the other kids how; I can see the judge's eyes, when he handed you the prize, you must've made the cutest bow; Yeah, you must've been a beautiful baby... 'Cause, baby, look at you now."

  [He looks over at Eve T., who is about to be fed to Lex's "babies"] 

  Miss Teschmacher : [in tears]  You can't do this to me...! Why, Lex? WHY?

  Lex Luthor : Because I love you, Miss Teschmacher.

  [He signals for Otis to drop Eve, which the henchman does. Then a familiar blue-and-red streak follows her down... and reappears, depositing Eve safely on the floor] 

  Superman : By the way, Miss Teschmacher, your mother sends her love.

  [He gazes over at Luthor, who sighs in defeat] 

• Lex Luthor : [swimming in the pool, listening to news broadcasts about Superman]  Miss Teschmacher! Turn it off.

  Miss Teschmacher : [lying by the sunlamps]  Lex, what's the story on this guy? Do you think it's the genuine article?

  Lex Luthor : If he is, he's not from this world.

  Miss Teschmacher : Why?

  Lex Luthor : Because, if any human being were going to perpetrate such a fantastic hoax, it would have been me! Otis! My robe!

  Otis : Right away, Mr. Luthor!

  Lex Luthor : It all fits somehow, his coming here to Metropolis. And at this particular time. There's a kind of cruel justice about it. I mean, to commit the crime of the century, a man would naturally want to face the challenge of the century.

  Otis : Listen, Mr. Luthor, maybe this guy that flies is just sort of passing through, you know?

  Lex Luthor : [Lex gets out of the pool, and stops at the top step. Otis starts helping Lex on with the robe as the bottom of it proceeds to get soaked]  Passing through? Not on your life Otis. Which I would gladly sacrifice, by the way, for the opportunity of destroying everything that he represents. And, Otis, by the way, next time put my robe on *after* I'm out of the pool.

• Miss Teschmacher : [looking at Lex's newspaper]  A meteorite found in Addis Ababa. Uh, I know I'm gonna get rapped in the mouth for this, but... So what?

  Lex Luthor : So what. You mean, to us, they're just meteorites. Fair enough. But the level of *specific* radioactivity is so high, to anyone from the planet Krypton, this substance is *lethal*!

  Otis : Wait a minute, Mr. Luthor. You mean, fire and bullets can't hurt this guy, but this stuff here...

  Miss Teschmacher , Otis : [in unison]  ... will kill him!

  Lex Luthor : Doesn't it give you, like, a shudder of electricity... to be in the same room with me?

  Miss Teschmacher : [laughs]  Not like the shudder *you're* gonna get when you try to lay that rock on him. He can see you coming for miles with those super-peepers of his.

  Lex Luthor : [obviously, he's already thought of this]  "Oh, Lord... You gave them eyes, yet they cannot see." Nor can Superman, through lead.

  Miss Teschmacher : [understanding]  He... can't... see... through... lead!

  Lex Luthor : And Kryptonite will destroy him. Any questions, class?

  Miss Teschmacher : I wonder what they're wearing in Addis Ababa.

  Otis : Looks like a burnoose. You know... are we going to Addis Ababa, Mr. Luthor?

• Miss Teschmacher : Tell me something, Lex, why do so many people have to die for the crime of the century?

  Lex Luthor : Why? You ask why? Why does the phone always ring when you're in the bathtub?

  [walking away] 

  Lex Luthor : *Why* is the most diabolical leader of our time surrounding himself with total nincompoops?

  Otis : I'm back, Mr. Luthor!

  Lex Luthor : Yes, I was just talking about you.

• [Lex switches on the remote door, pushing the police officer into the subway train's path killing him] 

  Miss Teschmacher : Sick. You're really sick.

  Lex Luthor : Sick, Miss Teschmacher? Sick, when I'm mere days from executing the crime of the century? No, no, no, no. Step away from that, please. How do you choose to congratulate the greatest criminal mind of our time? Huh? Huh? You tell me than I'm brilliant? Oh, no, no, that would be too obvious, I grant you. Charismatic. Fiendishly gifted, uh...

  Miss Teschmacher : Try "twisted."

• Miss Teschmacher : [after learning that the other ICBM is heading toward Hackensack, NJ]  Lex, my mother lives in Hackensack.

  [Luthor checks his watch and shrugs] 

  Lex Luthor : [DELETED LINE]  Eggs and omelettes, Miss Teschmacher.

  [pats her shoulder consolingly] 

  Lex Luthor : We'll give her a spot on the map.

  [He walks off; Eve looks anything but consoled] 

• Eve Teschmacher : Ugh. Lex, you're sick. You are really sick. You would take a diaper pin to cut a baby's throat. You'd fix the brakes on your own grandmother's wheelchair. I don't know, just explain one thing to me, Lex. Why do I love you so much?

  Lex Luthor : Because life with me is never dull.

• Lex Luthor : Fragments from the planet Krypton exploded and went into outer space. It is reasonable to assume that some of those particles of debris, drifted to Earth.

  Miss Teschmacher : [thinks]  Meteorites!

  Lex Luthor : Jawohl. Voilà!

  Otis : Walla.

  Miss Teschmacher : Walla.