Nothing in Common (1986)

Jackie Gleason: Max Basner

Photos 

Quotes 

• [last lines] 

  Max Basner : [to David]  You're the last person I ever thought would come through for me.

• Max Basner : Your best friend is your dick.

  David Basner : Now where did I learn that? Your best friend is *your* dick.

  Max Basner : Great, maybe the four of us can get together and have lunch.

• Max Basner : That was something we all had in common... your grandfather, me, you. We always knew how to talk a girl into bed.

  David Basner : I'm glad you still can.

  Max Basner : I can't. I can't do it anymore.

• Max Basner : I lost my lines. They fired me.

  David Basner : [David gets out of his Jeep and walks around angrily for a few moments, then gets back in the car]  What are you gonna do?

  Max Basner : I know you hate me. But you have to help me.

• David Basner : I could've been a great doctor.

  Max Basner : You could've been a great anything, son.