One Night Only (1984) Poster

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4/10
A failure in all but its main performance
Groverdox5 May 2016
Warning: Spoilers
This is another '80s sex comedy, from Canada this time, where apparently social mores are a trifle looser. A major plot point features the main character getting together with her one true love... her cousin. That's about the only memorable detail, apart from the main actress's performance, which is endearingly plucky, making her the sexiest of the movie's many ladies, and surprisingly, she does show some skin. Usually the actual "characters" in these movies keep it all on while the movie works as a revolving door for strippers/nude models/porn starlets to come in front of the camera, bare it all (or some) and then disappear. I was glad to see some T 'n A from the only character in the movie you care anything about, the connection you get with her makes it much more erotic.

Anyway, the plot is something about a plucky young lady hosting a party for a hockey team with a bunch of hookers to raise money for... something. I forget. The movie fails at showing a convincing party, and is really just a sequence of unbelievably bad jokes and flashes of nudity. It all feels disjointed, you never get a sense of place or scene, and it's pretty hard to sit through.

For another '80s boob comedy that does a far better job of showing a party you can actually believe and might like to go to, see "The Beach Girls".
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Not good, but definitely memorable Canuck raunchfest
lazarillo13 August 2011
Casual fans of the early 80's T-and-A comedies (and their close cousins the early 80's slasher horror films) probably don't realize how much the country of Canada contributed to these "all-American" genres. Well, this particular film really wears its Canadian-ness on its sleeve as a group of sexy college co-eds decide (for reasons that eluded me)to prostitute themselves out to a visiting hockey team at a wild party they put together at a rich friend's house. The results are so over-the-top raunchy, they make "Porky's" look like a "Porky Pig" cartoon.

While I can't unreservedly rave about this kind of uber-hoser stupidity, there are several things that might make this worthwhile, at least for all the slobbering perverts out there. First, if you like early 80's slasher flicks like I do, you have undoubtedly seen the female Canuck leads--Lenore Zann, Helen Udy, and Wendy Landes--many times. Well, prepare to see a whole lot MORE of them here. Second, there's the very memorable climactic scene which involves the perverted middle-age coach (who'd I swear was in at least one "Porky's" movie) living out his fantasy of the "scary cave", an infantile-Oedipal thing that you really have to see to believe. (I'd personally rank it up there with the "baby carriage scene" in "Battleship Potemkin" in terms of truly unforgettable cinematic moments). And that's not the only queasy quasi-incest on display here. This has the typical innocent male virgin "losing it" to his long-sought-after true love scene, except in this case his "true love" happens to be his sexy first cousin! And while the virgin's moralistic cop father rushes to stop his son and niece from un-forking their family tree, HE gets sidetracked by one of his niece's young friends who takes him to bed and insists on calling him "daddy" (I'm starting to suspect there might be a reason why the Canadians sometimes look a little inbred. . .).

I suppose though if you're going to make an unapologetically raunchy, socially irresponsible, dementedly perverted flick like this, you may as well do it right. And this movie, if nothing else, certainly puts the puck in the net in that department.
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2/10
thank the lawd they stoppped there....
mcfly-3126 September 2010
Skinemax-type cable staple of the late 80s, this Canadian shot flesh fest is appallingly unwatchable 25 years later. Found it on the back end of another tape recently, and decided to revisit. Loaded with flat-chested remedial actresses, cartoonish "chase-and-bop" style gags...and incest??? The two leads are boy and girl cousins who have an odd reunification after years apart. Some sort of unresolved crush goes on between them, springboarded by a near kiss at her apartment. But that ain't the half of it.

This kissing cousin is a working girl waitress at a mom-n-pop slop house who overhears of a local hockey team's upcoming stag party. Most would shrug it off and clock out. Not this chick. She luckily resides with some fellow unscrupulous bimbos who hit the phones to round up all their female friends so they may commandeer said stag party and collect the $5-grand price tag!! Ah, those moralistic 80s.

Utter vacancy ensues, as scores of people run through hallways, faint, giggle, jiggle (their pathetic A-cup breasts), and cavort about in Movie Land as only these events could provide. Don't forget the jealous boy cousin trying to thwart the girl's carnal actions in a poor attempt at romance(???) amid all the chaos. Oh, and one rather large tidbit: despite an 80 minute runtime, at least thirty of those minutes are made up of musical montages. No lie. Thirty minutes. To some poor-man's Pointer Sisters gal group.

Actually had a promising beginning, ala Hot Dog in terms of a small-town sports comedy set-up, and Zann has a cute appeal as sort of trashier Meg Ryan, but this whole thing is far beneath any of its late-night nudie rivals of the time.
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10/10
Delicious, delicious cheese...
Raven_R2xA28 September 2008
This little straight-to-cable flick isn't The Godfather and it's not trying to be. But the combination of entry-level acting, burlesque humor, by-the-numbers 1980's pop music, too many topless lovelies to count, and a plot so implausible that it practically spits in the face of suspension-of-disbelief make this a delightfully cheesy piece of teenage-boy entertainment. The phrase "so bad it's good" doesn't even apply to this, because "bad" doesn't apply to it - it's pure escapist entertainment, and for my money, that's the best type. I saw this for the first time when I was 11 or 12 and in the habit of sneaking into my parents' den to watch Showtime Late Night on weekends (boys will be boys, right?) and this is one that always stuck in my memory. Finding a rental copy in college was a sublime moment and preserving it in digital is going to keep me young for another hundred years. Intellectual decompression at its finest.
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6/10
One night you won't forget, where for most people, this will probably warrant one view only
PeterMitchell-506-56436414 February 2013
If this film concentrated more on it's story, than it's sex and nudity in abundance, this would be a better film. This Canadian effort, of course with it's unknowns, some who look great nude, is real cheese ball, sleazy kind of fun, anyway, one strip scene, played to that trademark strip theme, duhdada duhdada... where we see a beaver shot in close up. The deal here is some girlfriends, posing as hookers, work with some real ones as well, entertain a hockey team, to make some big bucks. And when I mean, entertain, I mean really entertain. At this party there's also an indoor pool, and you know what that means. We also some incorporate some mobsters into this story, but I forget why, as seeing the movie back in the nineties. The father of one of the hockey players goes off at the son when he slips a video in the VCR to watch one of his victory games. The same dad likes kinky sex, and playing pranks on some of the girls, one of them running out nude with a live crab that was attached to her you know what. He also likes to crawl backwards underneath a posse of naked women, inspecting their you know what, while wearing a miners cap. If sleaze is your thing, you'll probably get a kick out this, minus laughs, with some hot female bods to boot.
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9/10
Outrageously funny and sexy comedy
Macholic3 June 2002
This is one of the most enjoyable erotic comedies ever made, while not exactly subtle this really tickles the funnybone...oh and the ladies are gorgeous, not least Judy Foster starring as upperclass snobbish girl. Best line: Elisabeth: Do you want me to swallow a goldfish? The girls: Think bigger....and harder!

The wacky storyline revolves around a group of lady students making a buck on hijacking the sexparty for the city's hockyteam, meanwhile the American nephew of one of the girls turns up, with his born-again christian policeman father hot on the heels and a pimp mad about having his job hijacked. Everybody ends up in bed with everyone, lots of "Porky's" style humor. Great score and cast, this is a sadly overlooked gem that I have seen many times. 9/10
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Slap Shot, after the win! Spoilers.
BlackJack_B21 September 2002
Warning: Spoilers
This Canadian-made 80's sex farce is about a young college girl named Annie McGraw (Lenore Zann), who looks like an unrefined Nomi Malone. She works at a restaurant where she overhears famous hockey players talk about their annual New Year's Bash. They usually pay some shady guy named Wenko $50,000 to stage it, but Annie convinces some friends to help sway the hockey team to let them stage the party so they can gain the 50 grand (or bills) as it's referred to, while Wenko tries to infiltrate the party and make it a failure. So we get all the attributes of the 80's (I won't go through the list again, see my other 80's movie reviews) sex film. Some different things: One of the characters, Johnny-O is a straightlaced about partying as Michael Ontkean's character in Slap Shot was about fighting, a man gets his privates attacked by a live lobster, and the guys are watching a scene from the classic Quebecois-made "Scandale". Once again, this was how Polly Ann Costello, who later became known as Nomi Malone, went by the name of Annie McGraw to start her career in the adult entertainment business.
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its all about the pucks
JapanMovies6 August 2022
The days of simple tacky funny not like before. They dont make these like they did. Fun and still likeable. The hockey fans like the hockey side story.
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Playboy Channel filler
lor_13 March 2023
My review was written in June 1986 after watching the film on Key video cassette.

"One Night Only" is one of four Canadian features that rolled in November 1983 with financial backing from The Playboy Channel. Of interest only to voyeurs, feature, originally titled more appropriately "New Year's Eve", is an embarrassing example of what is euphemistically called Canadian content. It is currently available on video cassette.

Girls in a Montreal sorority house suddenly decide they want to go to bed with the players on the pro hockey team (apparently the Canadiens). Led by busty young blonde Anne (Lenore Zann) they maneuver to take over the annual New Year's Eve sex party traditionally organized by gangster Winkeau (Hrant Alianak) and borrow the posh mansion of the parents of sorority sister Elizabeth (Judy Foster) for the occasion. When there aren't enough college girls to service the pucksters, Anne recruits local prostitutes to join the party, led by beautiful Louellla (Taborah Johnson), who also coaches the coeds in lovemaking techniques.

Exercise in dumb puns and vulgarity is designed mainlyu to show off some pretty girls sans clothing, okay for Playboy viewers, but a bore as a feature film. Pic's lame concept of satire is evident when team owner Mack (Jeff Braunstein) has to force his hotshot star Johnny (Martin Neufeld) to engage in drinking and sex when all the youngster wants to do is play hockey, do endorsements and appear on tv.

For a basically tame softcore outing, scripter P. Y. Haines oddly emphasizes incest, with sevral of the couples imagining they're father & daughter or mothe & son during sex, and the romantic payoff occurring when young Anne beds down with her even younger cousin Jamie (Geofrey MacKay) . Cast does a good job and is worthy of much better material.
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