- Detective Lance Boyle: [seeing the first murder victim, a guy dressed in full hockey outfit] Boy, hockey is a tough sport!
- [Kennedi is held captive on a talk show's set]
- Jeronahew: And our other guest is a current hostage. We're not going to reveal her name to you right now; we'll wait to see if you can guess who she is by the end of the program.
- [to Kennedi, who is about to be eaten by the killer tomatoes]
- Jeronahew: Your research grant has just been permanently cancelled.