Men at Work (1990)
Emilio Estevez: James St. James
Photos
Quotes
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Louis : Aww, lookie here. Looks like somebody threw away a perfectly good white boy!
[looks up to a poster of Jack Berger on a street sign]
Louis : And he sure looks a helluva lot like that dude!
Carl : We're screwed!
James : What do you mean, we? You're the one who pulled the trigger, pal!
Louis : What the hell is goin' on?
James : Uh, Louis, Carl seems to know this guy!
Carl : I don't know him at all!
James : What I'm trying to say is, uh, uh, uh, he shot him!
Carl : With a pellet gun!
James : But he thought he hit him in the butt!
Carl : I did him in the butt! Look Louis, I know that I did not kill this man. Last night, this guy was beatin' on his ol' lady. So I took it upon myself to end the dispute.
Louis : So you shot him?
Carl : With a pellet gun!
Louis : So you said.
[Louis stands the body of Berger up out of the barrel]
Louis : Now you said you hit him from your apartment across the way.
Carl : Yeah.
Louis : So how the hell did he end up here?
Carl : Wha, why don't you *ask* him?
James : This is wrong! We should just have gone to the cops and told them what happened!
Carl : Hey listen! You are just as guilty! You were there, that makes you an accomplice!
James : Screw you!
Carl : You are an asshole!
James : And you are a trigger-happy idiot!
Carl : Well, I'm not going to rot in jail alone!
James : Well you're not gonna screw up my life, you son of a bitch!
[James slugs Carl, and both begin to roll on the ground fighting]
Louis : Hey!
[Carl rushes over to break up the fight, dropping Berger's body]
James : You and your stupid pellet gun! Ohhh, waaaaahhh!
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James : [offering a slice of pizza to the pizza delivery man] Are you hungry? Would you like some?
Louis : [having a Vietnam flashback] Don't give him any, James.
James : Why not? He might be hungry.
Louis : He's a prisoner; he should be treated accordingly.
James : Have you completely lost your mind? We're not soldiers and he's not the enemy. He's a pizza man.
Louis : Back in Fubai, he would have been killed the second he knocked on that door. I would have snapped his neck like a twig. And he never would have seen it coming, either.
James : Louis, Louis, calm down!
Louis : [pointing the pellet gun at the pizza delivery man] The commie bastard gets no food!
-
James : What are you doing?
Carl : I hate shitheads who bully their women.
James : So what are you going to do?
Carl : Shoot him.
James : What?
Carl : It's the principle, James.
James : With a pellet gun? What are you going to accomplish using that stupid thing?
Carl : It allows me to seriously aggravate a situation without actually changing the course of history. It also stings like a bitch.
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James : I wanna report a murder and a kidnapping.
Dispatcher : Did they take the body?
James : No, no, no. I have the body.
Dispatcher : Did you kill the victim?
James : No, I didn't kill him.
Dispatcher : Have you been kidnapped?
James : I'm not the one who's been kidnapped. I know this sounds really strange...
Dispatcher : I don't think we can help you, sir.
James : Well, fuck me! Isn't that what the police are supposed to do - help people?
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James : Carl spends the evening with a beautiful woman and I'm stuck here with a lunatic and a corpse.
-
Pizza Man : [Louis is counting out the money to the pizza guy, who looks up and sees James wheeling Berger's body with a Nixon mask over his face to the bathroom. James spots the pizza guy looking, and moves faster] Uh, what's going on here?
Louis : Mind your business son.
Pizza Man : OK. Thank you sir!
Louis : You seen too much!
[Lewis grabs the pizza guy, pulling him into the apartment and starts spinning him around in a headlock]
Pizza Man : Ahhhhhhhh! Yaahhhhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhhhh!
James : Louis! What the hell are you doing?
Louis : He saw you with the body! He can start all kinds of trouble!
James : So you kidnap him? Good solution!
Pizza Man : [flailing] Here, take the money! I won't say anything to anybody!
Louis : You bet you won't!
[Louis swings him around one more time and puts him headfirst into the sheetrock wall]
Pizza Man : Waaaaaahhhh!
[Pizza guy's head slams into and puts a hole in the wall]
James : [grabs his head] Louis, what the hell?
Pizza Man : [Louis pulls the pizza guy's head out of the wall, holding him up] Aiiiiii, extra cheese?
[Pizza guy falls over, unconscious, tweeting birds are heard]
James : You're a madman!
Louis : [grits his teeth] He was provoking me!
James : This situation has definitely gotten way out of hand!
Louis : Go back to the window and keep Carl covered!
James : What the hell are we gonna do with him?
Louis : [grits his teeth again and grins] We gonna need some rope!
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[Carl and James playing Trivial Pursuit]
Carl : What does a phrenologist feel and interpret?
James : The size of Walt's asshole. A phrenologist feels and interprets the bumps on your head. Skull features.
James : Who was Richard Nixon's chief of staff during the final days of Watergate?
Carl : Oprah Winfrey.
-
James : Eh, Carl?
Carl : Yeah?
James : What did you mean when you said I was hopeless?
Carl : I meant exactly... what I said.
James : I still don't understand.
Carl : Well, let's examine the word: hope-less. Less than hopeful. That's what you are.
James : Am I majorly hopeless or partially hopeless?
Carl : I'd say, majorly. Why do you ask?
James : I'll try and change.
Carl : No, you won't.
-
Louis : Faster James! We're losing them!
James : I got it to the floor, Lewis!
Mike : [James gets pulled over. The cop gets out of his car, turns on his flashlight and walks towards the driver's side of the truck] Well, well! Lookie what we got!
[looks to Jeff standing at the back of the truck]
James : I am in no mood for this Mike! Just go ahead snd write the damn ticket so we can all move on with our lives!
Mike : Well, that might be such an easy thing to do there, Jimbo. See, you were doing 75 in a 35. And you ran a red light. That's wreckless driving as far as I'm concerned!
[shines the flashlight in the cab]
Mike : Who else you got with ya there, Jimbo?
[sees the gagged pizza man]
Mike : What the hell is going on here?
James : Heh, heh, heh... you're, you're never gonna believe this Mike! Heh, heh heh... I'm totally flattered, I can't even come up with a good lie!
Mike : Heh heh heh! What'd I tell you, James? I knew you were crooked! And I knew I'd catch up to you sooner or later!
[draws his gun]
Mike : All right, everyone of the vehicle right now!
-
Carl : You're a stupid little man, you're a stupid little man!
Louis : I said enough! I said cut it out!
[Carl seperates them, but James still wants to fight, so James tries to kick Carl]
Louis : Hey YO! I said knock it off! Now unless either one of you guys had a rope or a piece of wire and strangled this guy, I'd say you're both in the clear!
James : How the hell would you know?
Louis : [hauls up the body to a standing position] Look. See? You can see the marks whatever was used made around his neck. Pretty nasty job, too.
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Carl , James : [Carl and James have just dumped their last load at the city dump]
James : Come on, let's do the nasty.
Carl : Do we have to?
James : Yeah.
Carl , James : [Carl and James are in the back of the garbage truck with surgical masks which cover their noses and mouths. Using push brooms, the clean the truck of remaining liquids and trash]
Carl : Nasty!
James : Nasty!
Carl : Nasty!
James : Nasty!
Carl : Nasstttyyyy!
James : Ugh, So Naaaaassstttyyy!
-
James : [James, Berger's body, Pizza Man and Louis sit in James's truck watching Potterdam's men dumping the toxic waste barrels. He pulls back the recoiler on the rifle and empties out one pellet] Well, a lotta good this will do us.
Pizza Man : A pellet gun? You've been holding me hostage all night with an *air rifle*?
James : Shut up.
Pizza Man : This is too much.
-
James : great carl gets to spend the eveing with a woman and im stuck here with a lunatic and a corpse.
