Postcards from the Edge (1990)

Mary Wickes: Grandma

Quotes 

• Grandma : Oh, go on and cry. You'll pee less, as my grandma used to say.

• Suzanne : Aw, shut up, Grandma.

  Grandma : I beg your pardon?

  Suzanne : I should think you would.

  Grandma : You see there? Now if you washed her mouth out with soap when she was little, like I told you, maybe she'd have some respect now!

  Suzanne : [talks over]  I'm simply suggesting we all try to enjoy one each other without having to assign blame.

  Grandma : Ooh, listen to Miss Snootybritches. "Assign blame," hee hee.

  Suzanne : [pushes her towards the door]  Come on!

  Grandma : Just what do you think you're doing, young lady?

  Suzanne : I'm moving you out to the waiting room.

  Grandma : Well, there's no need to shove! I'm going! You know what you need? I good pop on the butt like I used to give your mother! I--

  [Suzanne shuts the door on her] 

  Doris : If I thought I made you feel like that, I'd kill myself.

  Suzanne : Don't say that, even in jest, Ma, particularly when you're in a hospital. People might take it the wrong way.

• Suzanne : Did you want some more cashews, Grandpa?

  Grandpa : Did I already have some?

  Grandma : [under her breath, to Aretha]  He gets worse every day.

  Grandpa : Who gets worse? I heard that! Get off my back, woman! I wanna go home!

  Grandma : We're going home, dear.

  Grandpa : Not with you! I wanna go home.

  [smiles at Aretha] 

  Grandpa : Are we going soon?

  Aretha : Soon, sir. Very, very soon.

  Grandpa : You know what my daddy did?

  Aretha : What?

  Grandpa : [confused]  What were we talking about?

  Grandma : [under her breath, to Aretha]  I told ya.

  Grandpa : I heard that! Get out my back, woman! Yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap, yap--that's all you do all the livelong day!

  [singing] 

  Grandpa : And the farmer hauled another load away...

  [wanders off across the lawn] 

  Grandma : [sighs]  The other night he punched me when I was trying to put some clean pajamas on him.