Problem Child (1990)
Michael Richards: Martin Beck
Photos
Quotes
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Clown : [shows Martin a balloon giraffe, excitedly] Look! A giraffe!
Martin Beck : [sarcastically] Look! A FIST!
[punches the clown, knocking him out]
Martin Beck : Clowns.
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Martin Beck : I drove over a thousand miles to hang out with a seven-year-old?
Junior : I'm gonna be eight in two weeks.
Martin Beck : Don't count on it.
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Dr. Rupert Camarillo : I am so sorry about that, Martin. Now, let's get back to our examination. Shall we? What do you see in this one?
Martin Beck : [Thinking] I see a terrible thing. And be blamed for a crime somebody else did.
Priest : Remember, as you walk that the final pile, my son. Keep one thing in mind.
Martin Beck : [Getting drunk] Hey, pop.
Priest : Yes, my son?
Martin Beck : You're gonna for me when I get in the chair.
Guard #1 : Sir? Sir, oh, sorry to bother you, sir. I think this cake came for you.
Martin Beck : I'm completely innocent and deserve to be free.
[Bowtie Killer reads the cake. "Happy trails, Martin! You pal, JR."]
Martin Beck : Hey, this is for my good friend J.R.
[Thinking]
Martin Beck : Some people not many believe me. Everybody else is after me. I see what's gonna happen to me here. They want me in the electric chair. I have to escape.
Warden : Let's get this over with before the utility rates go up.
Martin Beck : [the Bowtie Killer caught the priest] Drop your guns! Right! The part they.
[the two prison guards drop their weapons and order the warden to sit in the electric chair]
Martin Beck : Sit.
[Martin taking the priest out and closed the door and lock them up]
Martin Beck : Nobody up for me, Warden! I get the lights!
[Continue to look up the examination very carefully]
Martin Beck : I see... blood!
[Martin strangles the psychiatrist]
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Martin Beck : Uh, I see a furry bunny. Hmm. And the furry bunny is running through... delicate, white snowflakes.
Warden : He's lying! That's not what he sees.
Dr. Rupert Camarillo : I'm sorry. I'm conducting an examination. Now what do you see, Martin?
Martin Beck : I see a meadow. Pink flowers.
Warden : He's lying again! How can he see pink?
[Looking in the picture]
Warden : It's a black-and-white picture!
[Turned to Martin]
Warden : There is no pink!
Dr. Rupert Camarillo : Warden, if you don't stop interrupting, I am going to ask you to leave.
Warden : Well, there is no pink!
Martin Beck : [Continued the examination] I see white, fluffy clouds...
Warden : No, you don't. You see murder. You see guts! You see those seven dead bodies in Chula Vista!
Dr. Rupert Camarillo : My patient has the right - I'm going to ask you to leave.
Warden : All those damn liberal laws. Don't you understand? He sees blood!
Dr. Rupert Camarillo : No, that's what you see!
[Shoves warden out of the door and leaves]
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Junior : Gee, I've never been to the circus before. I'd sure like to try a swizzle dog.
Martin Beck : Yeah, well, I hate circuses. Nothin' worse than a bunch of clowns tryin' to make you laugh.
