Encino Man (1992)

Michael DeLuise: Matt

Quotes 

• Matt Wilson : [after Matt and his goons have Dave hanging from a bulletin board at school]  Robyn wouldn't piss on your gums if your teeth were on fire.

  Dave : [helplessly]  Yes, she would.

  Matt Wilson : [he and his goons laugh]  SHOOOOOOSH! Hush, please! Showing your ignorance again, Morgan! Some of us pump...

  [the goons fist bump each other] 

  Matt Wilson : and some of us slump. You should try some pump, Morgan. It might clear up your acne.

  Dave : [Matt begins to write on Dave's forehead with a magic marker]  N-no. Stop... stop it!

  Matt Wilson : [Matt's goons laugh as he continues]  Why do you make me do this?

  Dave : What're you writing? Hey! What did you write!

  Dave : [Matt finishes writing "EAT ME" and taps Dave's forehead hard with the marker... he walks to the fire alarm and pulls it]  Matt... NOT THE FIRE ALARM! MATT! MATT!

• Matt Wilson : [Matt bursts in at the prom just as Link is about to be crowned prom king]  WAIT!

  [shoves through the crowd towards the stage] 

  Matt Wilson : WAIT!

  [he shoves Link back] 

  Student Announcing Prom King : What're you trying to do, Matt? Come on, stop it!

  [Matt takes the crown from him and shoves him back as well] 

  Matt Wilson : [takes microphone]  This is our school, right?

  [students murmur in affirmation] 

  Matt Wilson : And we have a right to know if something is bogus that's going down in our school, right?

  [the murmurs continue, he points to Link] 

  Matt Wilson : And someone right here has taken you for a ride!

  [Link grabs Matt's finger, Matt yanks it away] 

  Matt Wilson : His name isn't Linkavitch Chumovsky and he's not from Estonia.

  Robyn Sweeney : Matt, will you just stop this already!

  Matt Wilson : [to Robyn]  SHOOOOOOOSH! Trust me.

  [back to the crowd] 

  Matt Wilson : They've all been lying to us! But I found out... I know the truth. Do you want to know the truth?

  [students shout affirmatively] 

  Matt Wilson : Do YOU want to know what he REALLY IS?

  [students shout affirmitavely again] 

  Matt Wilson : He's a caveman.

  [Link nods and walks forward, smiling... students cheer for him, Matt stares at the crowd in disbelief] 

  Matt Wilson : No... NO! Look... he's a freak! I got pictures!

  Dave : [Dave and Stoney burst in and rush to the stage, Dave tries to take the pictures from Matt, the cheers continue]  NO!

  Matt Wilson : [waving pictures]  SEE?

  Dave : Let me see them! Give me those pictures! Matt give me those!

  Matt Wilson : [punches Dave]  No!

  Robyn Sweeney : Dave!

• Link : [calling out to Matt, who's pummeling Dave at the hockey rink]  Wheeze the juice!

  Matt Wilson : [Matt stops and turns to Link]  HEY! You wanna a piece of me?

  Matt Wilson : [Matt skates up to Link]  I don't know you, I don't like you. As of now, I'm all over you.

  [Matt punches Link in the face] 

• Matt Wilson : [after Matt has punched Dave at the prom, knocking him into the crowd, Link bows 'Karate Kid' style before him... Matt is clearly off-guard]  What are you doing, fag?

  Matt Wilson : [Link head-butts Matt and picks him up in a fireman-style carry, spins him around and throws him towards the crowd, Matt lands in the prom cake]  Hey! Heeeeyyy! No, no, NO!

  [crowd cheers for Link]