Felidae (1994)

Ulrich Tukur: Francis

Quotes 

• Francis : [noticing Felicity's eyes]  You're blind.

  Felicitas : I'm not blind. I just can't see.

• Francis : He lost his innocence, Bluebeard, as man has lost his.

• Francis : I swear that whoever murdered Felicity is going to pay for it!, you hear me you bastard I'm going to make you pay!

  Blaubart : We'll get you shithead!

• Francis : [spotting a dead cat with her stomach and throat ripped out]  Oh my God...

  Kong : Looks like he's run out of steam suddenly, that's what happens to you when you eat too much junk food.

  Francis : Yeah I'm out of breath and it looks like I'm not the only one.

  [indicating the dead cat] 

  Kong : What bullshit you talking now?

  [gasps] 

  Kong : Solitaire! Oh Solitaire! What have they done to you? What the hell has that evil bastard done? My lovely, lovely Solitaire!

  [cries] 

  Francis : Who was she?

  Hermann 1 : Solitaire was the boss' favorite girl, and chances are those are his family you can see as well.

  [pointing out the dead kitten fetuses] 

  Kong : I'm gonna kill him, I'm gonna hamburger him, I'll tear his balls off and stuff them down his throat, what kind of heartless bastard would do this? Who? Who? Tell me!

  [to Francis] 

  Kong : Was it you? No, you didn't have the time. Well then who did it? Who was it?

• Pascal : [types the word "FELIDAE" on the computer]  Do you know the meaning of this word, Felidae?

  Francis : Could it be a scientific name for all our family divisions, "cats" as they're usually called?

  Pascal : Felidae. Evolution has created an astounding number of various creatures. Not one however deserves the respected wonder the genus Felidae has earned.

  [shows on the computer a list] 

  Francis : Wow! What did you combine on this list.

  Pascal : Those of us who live in the neighbourhood, name, age, gender, breed, marking. I almost forgot, I need to enter you now as well.

  Francis : Incredible!

  Pascal : Yes it is. Even better if it can help us solve a murder.

  Francis : Did you know it all of the dead brothers?

  Pascal : Yes! They were all on the prowl after some female in heat.

  Francis : I... I have an idea. Find out what breed they were. That may lead us to a new tie-up.

  Pascal : Simple enough.

  [shows on the computer the murdered cats' type of race] 

  Pascal : Well, none of them were partically aristocratic examples of Felidae.

  Francis : But all the same race, so they were'nt just excited and male. They were all European Shorthairs.

• Felicitas : You're new in the neighborhood.

  Francis : That's right. Francis.

• Nhozemphtekh : I'm new around here, that's all you need to know. Your lady is just as she is.

  Francis : Your breed is new?

  Nhozemphtekh : Not new, no, it's old. Or in simple language, old and new. Or, different. Figure it out for yourself Francis.

  Francis : How did you know my name?

  Nhozemphtekh : A little bird in a tree told me.

  Francis : And what's your name?

  Nhozemphtekh : My name matters as little as my breed. It wouldn't anything to you.

• Francis : Very impressive, have we come to the house of an art collector or a pimp?

  Blaubart : Your guess is as good as mine, I believe the can opener who owns this joint has some sort of job as a scientist or was it a parapsychologist? I don't know.

• Francis : Hey, Bluebeard.

  Blaubart : Yeah?

  Francis : Sounds to me like you're backtracking a little, aren't ya?

  Blaubart : You don't say... and what makes ya think so?

  Francis : Well, you told 'em I'm your friend.

  Blaubart : ...ah.

• Blaubart : [spotting dead cat with his throat torn]  It must've been a can opener.

  Francis : Pardon? Can opener? I'm sorry, you've lost me.

  Blaubart : It must've been a friggin' can opener. Ain't it obvious? He gave our poor little Sascha an extra ventilation hole in the throat.

  Francis : Oh, you mean a man. Did you witness it?

  Blaubart : Hell no. But only men are brutal enough to do a thing like this. Lousy can openers. The only thing they're good for is opening our dinner cans.

• Blaubart : Hey little smartass, what do they call you?

  Francis : Francis.

  Blaubart : [grunts] 

• Francis : There's a plate there. Looks like this place was a doctor's office. That would explain the chemical smell.

• Blaubart : [enters the room] 

  Francis : Did you come in here to take a leak? Well you don't piss in here anymore. I live here now and I have my standards.

• Francis : Let me guess. This latest victim's also a tom, just like the other 4 stiffs.

  Blaubart : Smartass. How the hell did you know that?

  Francis : It's a guess, but an educated one.

  Blaubart : Anyway this time it's tight-assed Deep Purple that's taken out his last rat. His throat looks exactly though someone decided to test an ice pick to see if it works.

  Francis : One question, was he castrated?

  Blaubart : Purple had his jewels intact, but, he couldn't get it up anymore.

• Hermann 1 , Hermann 2 : [to Bluebeard]  Hi pussy cat!

  Francis : Oh boy, it was time to meet the neighborhood scumbags.

• Francis : The only thing that ties the two stiffs together is sex.

• Blaubart : Let me put the ol' thinking cap on.

  Francis : Oh you do think do you?

  Blaubart : I think non-stop. Surprises you, eh? I even read a book once.

  [laughs] 

• Pascal : As it shows, The murderer is beginning to make mistakes we may be able to exploit.

  Francis : I hope you're right, but I find it hard to imagine that this master of horror could make mistakes.

  Pascal : Then perhaps he is sending us a message.

• Pascal : Can I offer you both something to eat?

  Francis : Thanks, we've eaten already, Pascal.

  Blaubart : Shut up, will you asshole? Personally, I can handle another little mouthful or two.

• Francis : [talking about Felicity]  Her eyes were wide open, as though even with her last breath the one thing she longed desperately for was to see.

• Francis : Why weren't the bodies of Sascha, Deep Purple, Solitare... Felicity, down there?

• Francis : [angrily]  FUCK!

• Francis : Maybe we should be getting back to Felidae.