- [Douglas Pearl tees off... and his golf ball goes into a bunker]
- Harold Lapping: It's not fair, is it, Douglas, old son? They don't build golf courses to match the way you hit the ball.
- [loud music starts in the distance]
- Det. Supt. Andy Dalziel: What the hell's that?
- Det. Insp. Peter Pascoe: Saturday night disco. Sixties revival night.
- Det. Supt. Andy Dalziel: Why would they want to revive *them*? It were bad enough the first time round.
- [a student has written "Screw Dalzeil" on the evidence board]
- Det. Supt. Andy Dalziel: I won't comment on the sentiment, but I will correct the spelling.
- [he crosses out his mis-spelled surname and writes it correctly]
- Det. Supt. Andy Dalziel: D-A-L-Z-I-E-L. Thus respecting the age-old rule, I before E except after C and especially after the Z in my name.
- Det. Supt. Andy Dalziel: And you, do you take any responsibility in any of this?
- Franny Roote: God no! I'm a child of the 80's, there's no such thing as society
- Det. Supt. Andy Dalziel: And who organized the bus crash?
- Franny Roote: Well that really was an act of God.
- Det. Supt. Andy Dalziel: Oh... You mean you *really* believe there's a superior being? Superior to you?
- Franny Roote: Maybe... But if the post falls vacant, I'll be applying.
- [Sam Fallowfield has been accused by a student of falsifying her exam grades and has been suspended until the inquiry has given its verdict. He comes into the Senior Common Room]
- Dr. Sam Fallowfield: I wasn't sure if I'd be welcome in here.
- Henry Saltcombe: The historians are on your side.
- Pierre Ferret: As is the modern languages department.
- Henry Saltcombe: Innocent until proved guilty. It's been in every civilised constitition in the history of history.
- Pierre Ferret: A united Europe is behind you.
- Henry Saltcombe: With the possible exceptions of the dynamic duo from Paleolithic Age.
- [he looks at Jane Scotby and Edith Disney; Jane Scotby gets up and bustles towards them]
- Jane Scotby: Mr Fallowfield.
- Dr. Sam Fallowfield: Miss Scotby.
- Jane Scotby: [angrily] It has been suggested to me...
- Dr. Sam Fallowfield: By Miss Disney?
- Jane Scotby: ...that your suspension from duty makes it improper for you to be present in the Senior Common Room.
- Dr. Sam Fallowfield: I'm suspended from teaching. I am not suspended from living. I'm not suspended from morning coffee breaks.
- Pierre Ferret: Or from spending time with his friends.
- Jane Scotby: Hmm!
- [she walks off, in a huff]
- Henry Saltcombe: Exits left in a cloud of self-righteous indignation.
- Pierre Ferret: Batwoman continues to flex her wings.