Tarzan (1999)

Brian Blessed: Clayton

Photos 

Quotes 

• [after being returned to camp by Tarzan] 

  Jane Porter : Oh, my goodness! Daddy, I was walking. There was... was a little baby, little baby monkey, and I drew a picture!

  Professor Porter : Yes, go on.

  Jane Porter : Suddenly, the monkey starts crying.

  Professor Porter : Oh, poor thing.

  Jane Porter : But, I turn around and there's a whole FLEET OF THEM. An ARMY of monkeys! A huge tree full of monkeys, screaming at me!

  [imitates a monkey screaming at him] 

  Professor Porter : [laughing at her]  That's theropithecus baboonus! She's very good at this!

  Jane Porter : Terrified! I was terrified! Suddenly, I was swinging, on a vine, in the air! Swinging, in the air!

  Professor Porter : With the monkeys!

  Jane Porter : I was in the air! And then, I was all surrounded!

  Professor Porter : What did you do?

  Jane Porter : And, Daddy! They took my boot!

  Professor Porter : Your boot - those are the ones I bought you.

  Jane Porter : And I was SAVED. I was saved by a flying, wild man in a loincloth.

  Professor Porter : Loincloth? Good Lord.

  Clayton : What is she talking about?

  Professor Porter : I haven't the foggiest idea. Takes after her mother, you know. She came up with stories like that. Not about men in loincloths, of course.

• [Tarzan takes Clayton's gun and aims it at him] 

  Clayton : Go ahead. Shoot me.

  [chuckles] 

  Clayton : Be a man.

  [a shot is heard, but not from the gun; it's Tarzan mimicking a gunshot] 

  Tarzan : Not a man like you!

• Professor Porter : Moves like an ape but looks like a man. He could be the missing link!

  Clayton : Or our link to the gorillas.

• Clayton : [Draws a crude gorilla on Jane's chalkboard and points to it with the chalk]  Gorilla.

  Tarzan : [Takes the chalk and examines it]  Gor-illa.

  Professor Porter : [Excited]  Oh! Oh! He's got it!

  Tarzan : Gor-illa!

  [Proceeds to scribble wildly on the chalkboard] 

  Tarzan : Gorrrrr-illllla!

  Professor Porter : Oh, perhaps not...

• Clayton : Even if you hadn't grown up a savage, you'd be lost. There are no trails through a woman's heart.

• Clayton : If I can teach a parrot to sing "God Save the Queen," I can certainly teach this savage a thing or two.

• Clayton : Hiding, are we? Good! I could use a challenge, because after I get rid of you, rounding up your little ape family will be all too easy!

• [repeated line] 

  Clayton : Have we met?

• Jane Porter : And there were gorillas.

  Professor Porter , Clayton : Gorillas?

  Clayton : You found the gorillas? Where, Jane? Where?

  Jane Porter : He left with them.

  Professor Porter : Who did? Who?

  Jane Porter : Tarzan.

  Clayton : Tarzan?

  Jane Porter : The ape man.

• Jane Porter : [after Clayton fires in the air]  Mr. Clayton, please. What if it's a gorilla?

  Clayton : It's no gorilla.

• Jane Porter : [telling her father about Tarzan]  The point is, think about what we could learn from him. We must find him.

  Clayton : [frustrated]  Professor! You're here to find gorillas. Not indulge some girlish fantasy!

  Jane Porter : [also frustrated]  Fantasy? I didn't imagine him! Tarzan is...

  [Tarzan suddenly appears right between them. Clayton gasps in surprise and Jane smiles] 

  Jane Porter : Real.

• Clayton : I'm so sorry for the rude welcome, old boy, but I couldn't have you making a scene when we put your furry friends in their cages.

  Tarzan : Why?

  Clayton : Why? For 300 pounds sterling a head. Actually, I have you to thank, my boy. Couldn't have done it without you.

• Clayton : Ah, yes. I remember you. I think this one would be better off stuffed.