- Newspaper Editor: [Reading headlines from a rival tabloid] "4 Love Nests Raided Last Night". "Famous Columnist Taken for a Ride". "Society Girl Elopes with Her Mother's Gigilo". Listen, you fat heads! Every rival tab in town is stepping out ahead of us! If you birds can't get the dope when it breaks, go back to the school of journalism. I want news! And I don't care whose key hole you have to peep through to get it!
- Newspaper Editor: [Sound of gunfire. Margie rushes in with her hat and backside smoking] Why, Marge, you're all shot up!
- Margie: Am I? Look at that hat. Look at it! Boss, it's a good thing I had on my bulletproof brassier; that gang would have made me look like a punch board.
- Football Coach: Say, this is about the lousiest first half I've ever seen you fellas play. Why you oughta be on the ping pong squad! What's the matter with ya? Where's your guts? Get in there and tackle 'em! Hit 'em hard! Hit 'em low!