- Grizabella: Touch me! It's so easy to leave me all alone with the memory of my days in the sun. If you touch me, you'll understand what happiness is. Look! A new day has begun.
- Rum Tum Tugger: You ought to ask Mr. Mistoffoles, the original conjuring cat. There can be no doubt about that. Please, listen to me and don't scoff. All his inventions are off his own bat.
- Munkustrap: [speaking about Rumpus Cat] You never saw anything fiercer!
- [Rumpus Cat's hair stands on end]
- Munkustrap: ...Or hairier.
- Jennyanydots the Gumbie Cat: Bustopher Jones is not skin and bones.
- Bombalurina: In fact, he's remarkably fat.
- Jellylorum: He doesn't haunt pubs.
- Jennyanydots the Gumbie Cat: He has eight or nine clubs...
- Jennyanydots the Gumbie Cat, Bombalurina, Jellylorum: For he's the St. James' Street cat.
- Old Deuteronomy: With cats, some say one rule is true: don't speak 'til you are spoken to. Myself, I do not hold with that. I say you should address a cat, but always keep in mind that he resents familiarity. You bow, and taking off your hat, address him in this form: O, Cat!
- All: If it happens the sun is shining bright...
- Rum Tum Tugger: ...you'd say we had nothing to do at all!
- Rum Tum Tugger: And we all say... oh well I never! Was there ever a cat so clever as Magical Mr. Mistofelees!
- Mungojerrie: It was... Mungojerrie!
- Rumpleteazer: And Rumpleteazer!
- Mungojerrie: And there's nothing at all to be done about that!
- Munkustrap: Are you blind when you're born?
- Demeter: Can you see in the dark?
- Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat: Dare you look at a king?
- Asparagus: Would you sit on his throne?
- Rum Tum Tugger: Can you say of your bite that it's worse than your bark?
- Alonzo: Are you cock of the walk...
- Grizabella: ...when you're walking alone?
- Munkustrap: Because Jellicles are and Jellicles do. Jellicles do and Jellicles would. Jellicles would and Jellicles can. Jellicles can and Jellicles do.
- Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat: From the driver and the guards to the bagmen playing cards, I would supervise them all.
- [beat]
- Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat: More or less...
- Demeter: I might mention Mungojerrie.
- Bombalurina: I might mention Griddlebone.
- Demeter, Bombalurina: Are nothing more but agents for the cat who all the time just controls the operation, the Napoleon of Crime!
- Bombalurina, Demeter, Jellylorum: But, when the day's hustle and bustle is done, then the gumbie cat's work is but hardly begun. She thinks that the cockroaches...
- Jennyanydots the Gumbie Cat: Just need employment...
- Bombalurina, Demeter, Jellylorum: To prevent them from...
- Jennyanydots the Gumbie Cat: Idle and wanton destroyment.
- Bombalurina, Demeter, Jellylorum: So she's formed from that lot of disorderly louts a troop of well-disciplined, helpful boy scouts...
- Jennyanydots the Gumbie Cat: With a purpose in life and a good deed to do...
- Bombalurina, Demeter, Jellylorum: And she's even created a beetle's tatoo!
- Asparagus: [mockingly] Jellicle cats are roly-poly!
- Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat, Mr. Mistoffelees: We know how to dance a gavote and a jig!