Love Stinks (1999)
Bridgette Wilson-Sampras: Chelsea Turner
Photos
Quotes
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Chelsea : All I ever wanted to do was spend my life loving you, you disgusting sack of shit.
Seth : If that's all you wanted, then why did you hire the sleaziest lawyer in town, you pathologically deluded, morally bankrupt, in-denial, self-esteem-deficient bitch on wheels?
Chelsea : I am NOT in denial.
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Seth : [in the shower] Oh my God! My hair is falling out!
Chelsea : You know stress will do that to ya!
Seth : Holy shit! It's really falling out!
[hair begins to fall out rapidly]
Seth : Oh my God! AHHH! OH! OOOHH!
[steps out of shower and looks into mirror]
Seth : AHHHHHHHHHHH! What did you do to me?
Chelsea : I didn't do anything! You must have used my hair remover instead of your conditioner
Seth : Noo! YOU PUT SOME IN THERE TO FUCK WITH ME!
Chelsea : No, I didn't! I swear!
Seth : Ooooohhhhh you are the fuckin' devil! THE DEVIL!
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Chelsea : [Sleeping in bed with Seth, he farts and the pets disperse] Ugh, you are such a pig!
Seth : Oh... man, I am so sorry! You know I had beans and broccoli for dinner and I washed them down with some crab cakes...
[farts loudly]
Seth : OH!...
Chelsea : [simultaneously] EWWW! Ew! Ew!
Seth : Goodness! I am so sorry. Would you like to spoon me? Because, I feel like I'm past the worst of it, and I need some cuddle-time - Oh, wait, no, I was wrong. Incoming!
[farts]
Seth : OH!...
Chelsea : [simultaneously] Ugh, you're sick! Ew!
Seth : My goodness! Keeping the neighbors up, huh? Feet are on fire. Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait!
[farts rapidly, four times]
Seth : Oh man! I've got skills! I've got game! Ah... mmmm - oh!
[farts loudly]
Seth : Ole!