Super Troopers (2001)

Steve Lemme: Mac

Photos 

Quotes 

• Captain O'Hagan : I swear to God I'll pistol whip the next guy who says "Shenanigans."

  Mac : Hey Farva what's the name of that restaurant you like with all the goofy shit on the walls and the mozzarella sticks?

  Farva : You mean Shenanigans?

  Mac : OOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

  Thorny : OOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

  [as they offer the Captain their pistols] 

• [Foster and Mac have pulled a man over for speeding and are deciding what game to play] 

  Mac : All right, how about "Cat Game?"

  Foster : Cat Game? What's the record?

  Mac : Thorny did six, but I think you can do ten.

  Foster : Ten? Starting right 'meow?'

  [Mac laughs - they walk up to the car, and Foster taps on the driver side] 

  Larry Johnson : Sorry about the...

  Foster : All right meow. (1) Hand over your license and registration.

  [the man hands him his license] 

  Foster : Your registration? Hurry up meow. (2)

  [Mac ticks off two fingers] 

  Larry Johnson : Sorry.

  [the man laughs a little] 

  Foster : Is there something funny here boy?

  Larry Johnson : Oh, no.

  Foster : Then why you laughing, Mister... Larry Johnson?

  [pause] 

  Foster : All right meow, (3) where were we?

  Larry Johnson : Excuse me, are you saying meow?

  Foster : Am I saying meow?

  [Mac puts his hands up for the fourth one, but makes an "eehhh" facial expression, as he is considering the last one] 

  Larry Johnson : I thought...

  Foster : Don't think boy. Meow, (4) do you know how fast you were going?

  [man laughs] 

  Foster : Meow. (5) What is so damn funny?

  Larry Johnson : I could have sworn you said meow.

  Foster : Do I look like a cat to you, boy? Am I jumpin' around all nimbly bimbly from tree to tree?

  [Mac is gut-busting laughing] 

  Foster : Am I drinking milk from a saucer?

  [feigned anger] 

  Foster : Do you see me eating mice?

  Foster : [Mac and the man are laughing their heads off now]  You stop laughing right meow! (6)

  Larry Johnson : [the man stops and swallows hard]  Yes sir.

  Foster : Meow, (7) I'm gonna have to give you a ticket on this one. No buts meow. (8) It's the law.

  [rips off the ticket and hands it to the man] 

  Foster : Not so funny meow, (9) is it?

  Foster : [Foster gets up to leave, but Mac shakes his hands at him, indicating only nine meows]  Meow! (10)

• Mac : But our shenanigans are cheeky and fun!

  Thorny : [referring to Farva]  Yeah, and his shenanigans are cruel and tragic.

  Foster : [after a pause]  Which... makes them not really shenanigans at all.

  Mac : [in a silly voice]  Evil shenanigans!

• [Mac gets shot in the crotch while wearing the steel cup] 

  Foster : How you feelin' there, Mac?

  Mac : Good enough... to fuck... your mother.

• Mac : And that was the second time I got crabs.

  Foster : Awesome.

  Thorny : Afternoon.

  Mac : Hey.

  Foster : Hey.

  Thorny : It stinks like sex in here.

• Mac : Oh, c'mon, we're like the sons you never had.

  Captain O'Hagan : If you were my son, Mac, I would've smothered you by now.

  Mac : Smothered me in gravy you big dirty man.

• Captain O'Hagan : Bulletproof cup, huh? I invented this gag, Rabbit. Only in my day, the rookie got naked.

  [fires through the window, accidentally shooting out the glass] 

  Captain O'Hagan : And we also used blanks. You're a sick motherfucker, Mac.

  Mac : Thanks, Chief!

• Mac : You boys like Mex-i-co? Yee- Haww!.

• Foster : Okie silly dilly dokie-o. I'm an idiot.

  Mac : That's true.

• [Farva brings the boys a round of coffee, and has left a surprise in Rabbit's] 

  Rabbit : [dryly]  Oh, look, a bar of soap.

  Farva : Oh, shit, I got you good, you fucker!

  Mac : *Awesome* prank, Farva.

  Farva : Better than the crap you pull, Mac!

  Captain O'Hagan : Look, fellas...

  Mac : [to Rabbit]  Bite it, rook! You'll make him look like a dick!

  Rabbit : Nah...

  Captain O'Hagan : Every Thursday night I walk into the lodge to play Hearts...

  [Mac persists in goading Rabbit as O'Hagan continues] 

  Mac : Seriously, rook, bite it. Do it. Don't be a wuss!

  Captain O'Hagan : ...and they always have my Old-Fashioned just waiting there...

  Mac : Don't be a wuss, bite it!

  Captain O'Hagan : ...I like that. I like it here...

  Mac : Bite it. Bite it!

  Captain O'Hagan : [Fed up]  Oh, hell! Give me the goddamn soap!

  [He grabs the soap, takes a bite, and spits it at Mac] 

• Mac : ...And that was the second time I got crabs.

• Mac : How's your shooting, Thorny?

  Thorny : Good. I've been dead on all morning.

  Mac : What about that little guy?

  [points to a bullet hole in the shooting target's neck] 

  Thorny : Who, that little guy? I wouldn't worry about that little guy.

• Rabbit : [lifting soap out of coffee]  Oh, look, a bar of soap.

  Farva : Oohoohoh shit. I got you good, you fucker!

  Mac : Awesome prank, Farva.

  Farva : Better'n the crap you pull, Mac.

• Thorny : [finishes Syrup, slams bottle on table]  I am all that is man!

  [Rabbit struggles to Finish] 

  Mac : What's a-matter Rabbit, your mother teach you to Chug?

• Captain O'Hagan : What did you find out at the weigh station?

  Mac : My cruiser weighs 16,000 kilograms!

• Captain O'Hagan : Did you guys put in for any transfers yet?

  Mac : I applied for a guard job - at the post office.

  [collective groan] 

  Thorny : Hey, you'll finally be able to shoot someone.

• Mac : No, Farva, you are under arrest for being a complete and total fuckhead.

• Mac : Your mother should've swallowed you, Rando!

• Mac : [Chugging maple syrup]  Three... two... one... DO EET. Oh go girlfriend.

• Mac : You boys like Mex-ee-co? YEEEE-HOO!

• Mac : But our shenanigans are cheeky and fun

  Thorny : And his shenanigans are cruel and tragic

• Farva : Don't call me radio, unit 91.

  Mac : Then don't call me unit 91, radio.

  Farva : Are you done?

• [In a silly voice with his eyes crossed] 

  Mac : Do we look like the two dumbest guys in the world to you?