Lone Star State of Mind (2002)

Joshua Jackson: Earl Crest

Photos 

Quotes 

• Earl : [voiceover]  I don't know for sure exactly how Andy got elected six months ago in the first place, but all I do know is that nobody meant for it to happen. It's like the ugly girl in high school who gets picked for prom queen. It ain't nice, but some a-hole thinks it's funny and nominates her, and then other people start voting for her thinking no one else is gonna and pretty soon, KAPOW!, the school is stuck with Sheriff Andy for prom queen.

• Wayne : Smyrna, Earl's kissing his sister again.

  Earl : God damn it, Wayne, I really wish you would stop calling her that.

• Baby : You mad, Earl?

  Earl : No, Baby, I ain't mad at you. I'm pretty sure Junior ain't gonna be none to happy with it, though.

• Earl : You ever get the feeling you're, like, being watched, Baby?

  Baby : You mean by horny guys?

• Earl : If it wasn't for Baby, I'd have drowned you in that river.

  Junior : Well, for your information, EARL, I can swim!

• Baby : Earl Crest, don't you know it ain't polite to stare?

  Earl : Well, Baby, it's only natural for a man to stare when he sees the prettiest gal west of Mississippi.

  Baby : Just west?

• Baby : After work I think I'm gonna go home and change.

  Earl : I don't see the point though, Baby. You just can't improve on perfection.

• Tinker : I don't got nothing to say.

  Earl : Well, that's good, 'cause I was planning on doing most of the talking anyhow.

• Tinker : I'm gonna kick the shit out of you, Earl.

  Earl : So you said, Tinker.

• Doctor : Well, you need to tell that idiot who shot you that he better take some shooting lessons!

  Earl : Now, don't be TOO disappointed, Doc.

• Jimbo : I'm gonna kill Tinker for shooting you.

  Earl : Well, Jimbo, I think Baby already beat you to it.

  Baby : Damn right.

• Baby : You want me to come with you? It's my day off.

  Earl : No, Baby, I don't intend on killing anyone today, so your services won't be needed.

• Earl : [voiceover]  Now, I asked myself why in the world would I continue to try and help a retard like Junior who, in the Darwinian view of things, was only gonna get hisself selected against eventually anyway.

• Tinker : They're gonna shoot us like fish in a bowl the minute we walk in the door.

  Earl : Well, maybe we'll get lucky, Tinker, and they'll only shoot you!

• Baby : [to Junior]  You shot my fiancé, now I'm gonna show you how it feels.

  [picks up the gun] 

  Earl : Uh, baby? Would you mind putting off shooting Junior until after you take me to see Doc Cragen?

  Baby : [throws the gun off somewhere in the tall grass]  Whatever you say, honey.

• Baby : Hey.

  Earl : Hey yourself.

  Baby : How you feeling?

  Earl : I'm feeling all right... all bullet wounds considered.

• Earl : Hey, we going to bowl or what?

  Jimbo : What's the point, Earl?

  Earl : Well, the point is beer. That's the point!

  Jimbo : Look, I'll tell you what... I'll buy you and Baby all the beer in the world and I'll just call it a going away present. How about that, Earl?

• Tinker : I told you I was going to kill ya, didn't I?

  Earl : Don't you think we've been through enough for one night, Tinker?

  Tinker : It ain't enough until I said "it's enough". And I ain't said "it's enough". Well I... I said "it's enough", but it ain't enough.

• Tinker : Tape her hands behind her back.

  Baby : Earl Crest, don't you dare!

  Earl : I'm sorry, angel.

  Baby : Tinker, you're still just a damn idiot, ain't ya? How'd they like that small willie of yours in prison, anyhow?

  Tinker : Tape her mouth shut, too!

  Baby : Once an idiot, always an idiot, I say. Ain't that right, Earl?

  [Earl tears off a strip of duct tape] 

  Baby : Earl, I'm serious this time, you do this...

  Earl : Look, I'm sorry, Angel

  [Earl gags Baby by duct taping her mouth shut] 

• Earl : Junior, you are so dumb.

  Junior : I'm not dumb. YOU'RE dumb.

• [Junior accidentally shoots Earl in the leg] 

  Earl : Oh... dammit, Junior!

• Jimbo : Do you think he's gay?

  Earl : Have my doubts, Jimbo.

• Earl : Don't touch my girl, Juan.

• Earl : Someone famous once said. Being fearless was the same as being stupid; that havin' courage didn't mean that you ain't afraid.

  Earl : That havin' courage didn't mean that you ain't afraid.

  Earl : Rather havin' courage meant being afraid but still being able to do what needs to be done inspite of it.