The Addams Family (TV Series)

Morticia Joins the Ladies League (1964)

John Astin: Gomez Addams

Photos 

Quotes 

• Gomez Addams : How long have you owned the circus?

  Oscar Webber : Oh, I bought it three years ago, but this past season everything's gone wrong. The fat lady fell in love. Couldn't eat. Couldn't sleep. Lost two hundred and forty pounds.

  Gomez Addams : That could be noticeable.

  Oscar Webber : Then Marvin the midget... He got himself on a vitamin kick. Little punk started growing again.

  Gomez Addams : Oh, no.

  Oscar Webber : Yeah. I went along with it for awhile, but when he hit five feet eight, I had to fire him.

  Gomez Addams : Five feet eight. Had you thought of billing him as the world's tallest midget?

• Morticia Addams : [observing Gorgo]  You know, I've been watching him play with Pugsley. They've been racing to the top of that tree. Pugsley's won every time.

  Gomez Addams : A true Addams. Of course, the boy has an advantage: Gorgo can't hang by his teeth like our son can.

• Morticia Addams : I know the effect you have on the opposite sex.

  Gomez Addams : Sometimes it frightens me.

  Morticia Addams : I live in constant fear that some woman will steal you away from me.

  Gomez Addams : Banish the fear, mi querida. You are the only cactus in the garden of my life.

• Morticia Addams : Darling, being married to you makes me the world's most fortunate woman.

  Gomez Addams : You always were so frank.

• Gomez Addams : Funniest thing happened to me in Springfield. Wish I could remember what it was.

• Gomez Addams : That boy - cute as a bat's ear.

• Gomez Addams : By all means, forget you were in a cage and just act like one of the family.

• Gomez Addams : Well, Lurch, there are some things you can do, and some things an ape can do.