- Charlene Darling: [Telling Andy why she is divorcing Dud] Last Sunday, I caught him makin' eyes at Idell Bushey durin' preachin'. And I know what they do up there in the hills when they say they're possum huntin'. They're just sittin' around the campfire, drinkin' hard cider, hittin' each other on the shoulder and hollerin' 'flinch!'.
- Floyd Lawson: [Barney accidentally rides into Floyd's yard on a horse] Barney, you seem to be on a horse! The reason I'm so surprised is... Well, I just didn't expect it!
- Barney Fife: [tries to get the horse to leave] Come on!
- Floyd Lawson: Don't leave on my account!
- Briscoe Darling: How many girls you know has got a wood floor and a husband that hardly ever hits ya?
- Briscoe Darling: [Agreeing with Andy to play another song] All right. Uh, how 'bout "Boil Them Cabbage Down"?
- Charlene Darling: [Protesting] Oh, no, Pa! That one makes me cry!
- Briscoe Darling: Just try to control yourself.
- Barney Fife: [reading from a book on mountain folklore] "Put a willow chip under a dog's head while he's dreaming and then put it under your own pillow. You'll have the same dream." I didn't know that.