Barney Miller (TV Series)
Bus Stop (1976)
Ron Glass: Det. Ron Harris
Quotes
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Capt. Barney Miller : [a grumpy Captain Miller approaches Harris' desk] What about you? How about my arrest reports for last month?
Det. Ron Harris : I'm working on them, Barney, but I got stuck on something.
Capt. Barney Miller : Oh, what?
Det. Ron Harris : [Turning to his typewriter] Well, this: "The suspect then turned on Officer Sloane and attacked him with..." I need a word that means "savage," but in a premeditated way.
Capt. Barney Miller : Use that.
Det. Ron Harris : [Shaking his head] Too awkward.
Capt. Barney Miller : [Frustrated] This is an arrest report, not a literary masterpiece, c'mon!
Det. Ron Harris : People downtown have come to expect something more when they see my name on a report.
Capt. Barney Miller : Forget your reputation - gimme the report!
Det. Ron Harris : Okay, Barney, but I'm gonna use my psuedonym.
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Det. Ron Harris : Yeah, thank. Uh, Barney... A bus went out of control and crashed into a building over on 12th Street. They think it was a hijack
Capt. Barney Miller : Hijack ?
Det. Ron Harris : Yeah
Capt. Barney Miller : Wojo, go with Harris
Det. Stan 'Wojo' Wojciehowicz : You bet
Det. Ron Harris : Man, you know, I ain't never been on a bus in this town
Det. Stan 'Wojo' Wojciehowicz : You kidding
Det. Ron Harris : Yeah, I can't afford a cab, I don't go
Det. Stan 'Wojo' Wojciehowicz : You go broke taking cabs
Det. Ron Harris : Plus, uh, I stay home a lot
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Det. Ron Harris : Ah... Barney, this is Mr. Strand, he was the bus driver
Mr. Strand, Bus Driver : What's that suppose to mean ?
Det. Ron Harris : What ?
Mr. Strand, Bus Driver : Your're looking for a fall guy, huh, look someplace else
Capt. Barney Miller : Mr. Strand, Detective Harris isn't accusing you of anything, he's just identifying you to me.
Mr. Strand, Bus Driver : Why single me out ? I mean, there are two other people he could of identified.
Det. Ron Harris : Uh, Barney, this is Miss Lambert. This is Mr. Quentin. And Neither of them is the bus driver .
Mr. Strand, Bus Driver : You see. You see. Punching... Punching... Punching...
Capt. Barney Miller : All right. All right. All right. Look, we got some questions. We got some questions, we want to ask you, all of you. So if you'll just have a seat, we will try to make it as painless as possible.
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Det. Ron Harris : Ah, Barney, we got problems
Capt. Barney Miller : What ?
Det. Ron Harris : Well, none of the victims... gonna sign the complaints against Brenner
Capt. Barney Miller : Oh... Wonderful. Five minutes ago, they we're screaming for his blood
Det. Ron Harris : They say they don't want to get any more involved
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Capt. Barney Miller : All right, ladies and gentlemen, what's the trouble
Harry Cranston : Well it seems to me that we spent enough time here, we got our stuff back, you got your punk and I got a business to run.
Capt. Barney Miller : We're not going to do much with our punk, unless we get your statements as witnesses
Harry Cranston : And spend our whole day in court
Capt. Barney Miller : Unfortunately, that's part of what we call the American Judicial System, yes
Miss Lambert : It might be nice, I've never seen you in the morning
Mr. Strand, Bus Driver : I ain't taking any more time off from work, you know how many guys are on line waiting for my job
Harry Cranston : I don't want to get involved
Capt. Barney Miller : Your all ready involved
Miss Lambert : From your mouth to his ear
Capt. Barney Miller : Weren't you the guy who was yelling that... that the police falling down on the job. Well, it's time for you to take some responsibility. We need your statements as witnesses. We need your testimony in court
Brenner : Hey, your not allowed to do that. That's badgering a witness
Det. Ron Harris : Clam up Brenner
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Mr. Strand, Bus Driver : Listen, I got to get out of here, you know how it is
Det. Ron Harris : Sure, Strand, we know how it is.
Mr. Strand, Bus Driver : I mean, they'll probably let him off anyway. It's all a waste of time
Det. Stan 'Wojo' Wojciehowicz : Yeah, thanks to you and you and your defeatist attitude
Det. Sgt. Nick Yemana : Here... Here
Mr. Strand, Bus Driver : If you get out of here, I'm warning you, stay off my bus !
Brenner : Wonderful to see you, weirdo! You know, guys like that give me such a headache
Det. Sgt. Arthur Dietrich : Oh yeah !
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Det. Ron Harris : Okay Brenner let's go
Brenner : Easy, easy I got sinus trouble , right ?
Det. Sgt. Arthur Dietrich : I'd stake my professional reputation on it
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Capt. Barney Miller : Okay, Harris, you and Dietrich take our friend over to Manhattan South. Tell them about the witnesses. Tell them to swear out subpoenas. Tell them to do whatever they want
Det. Ron Harris : Okay Barney
Capt. Barney Miller : Nick... Wojo , you two go over to the hospital. Maybe we can get some statements from the other passengers
Det. Stan 'Wojo' Wojciehowicz : All right
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Capt. Barney Miller : What's the story ?
Det. Ron Harris : It's a hold-up all the way
Capt. Barney Miller : These the passengers
Det. Ron Harris : That's some of them. Wojo is bringing the rest of them in another car. The suspect jumped off the bus as soon as it crashed. But we cordoned the block off so...
Capt. Barney Miller : Okay
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Harry Cranston : You got a whole room full of witnesses, how many more do you need for good sakes ?
Det. Ron Harris : Well, we try to squeeze in as many as we can . It helps block our view of the squalor.