Barney Miller (TV Series)

Experience (1975)

Hal Linden: Capt. Barney Miller

Photos 

Quotes 

• Captain Barney Miller : [Barney is trying to convince Fish that he's not too old to be a cop anymore]  Fish, I think of you as experienced. In an emergency you would be the first one I would call.

  Fish : You should call me first... I need time to put my teeth in.

• Captain Barney Miller : [a bomb has blown up in the squad room]  It was in the safe?

  Fish : Yeah, I put it there.

  Captain Barney Miller : You know there was petty cash in there? Forty bucks.

  Fish : Take it out of my check.

• Captain Barney Miller : [Barney and Wojo are using the phone at the same time while standing right next to each other. Barney was put on hold]  Come on! Come on!

  Wojo : Hello?

  Captain Barney Miller : Hello, Bomb Disposal?

  Wojo : No, it's Wojciehowitz.

  Captain Barney Miller : Get off the line. I'm trying to get Bomb Disposal.

  Wojo : Who's this?

  Captain Barney Miller : Barney!

  Wojo : Oh, hey, Barn, whattya need?

  Captain Barney Miller : GET OFF THE LINE!

• Captain Barney Miller : Marty, you keep ripping people off, they're going to put you away for a long time. Now, why don't you cut it out and get an honest job?

  Marty : Oh, don't give me that. I've had more jobs than you have hair on your head. I even tried to get on the police force.

  Captain Barney Miller : They turned you down?

  Marty : Of course they turned me down. It's ridiculous. What's wrong with a gay cop? There are gay robbers.

• Captain Barney Miller : I don't know. This whole bomb thing has me uneasy

  Det. Sgt. Nick Yemana : You know what it is Barney. It's an animal instinct, that comes from years of experience on the job, a sort of awareness, you know ? You can't buy it, you got it.

• Captain Barney Miller : 12th Precinct... Captain Miller speaking... Oh, yes Commissioner... Yes, sir. 5'o'clock again... . Well, we should have something on it in, uh, give me about a week... Could be a couple of days... Tomorrow, is definitely a possibility... How about holding the phone for a couple of minutes ?... Oh,yes, you got to have a sense of humor in a job like this... Yes, sir, I definitely can keep it to myself... . Yes, sir... .Yes, sir... .Yes,sir...