The Beverly Hillbillies (TV Series)
Duke Steals a Wife (1963)
Irene Ryan: Daisy Moses
Quotes
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Cousin Pearl Bodine : [Granny and Pearl, making sure that Jed can overhear them] Hey Granny?
Daisy Moses : Yeah, Pearl.
Cousin Pearl Bodine : If you had a beau drivin' up in a fancy car and a huggin' and a kissin' you, uh, wouldn't you want your kinfolk to meet that beau?
Daisy Moses : I sure would, Pearl, especially if I was givin' that beau expensive presents.
Cousin Pearl Bodine : You mean like a diamond choker?
Daisy Moses : That's what I mean.
Cousin Pearl Bodine : You know, I hear tell that French women is real fond of jewelry.
Jed Clampett : If you two are tryin' to make somethin' outa what just happened outside, you can leave off before you git started. All I was doin' was returnin' that lady's dog and that diamond choker was the dog's collar.
Cousin Pearl Bodine : Say Granny?
Daisy Moses : Yeah Pearl.
Cousin Pearl Bodine : What do you reckon that red stuff was smeared on Jed's cheeks.
Daisy Moses : I reckon he cut hisself returnin' that dawg.
Cousin Pearl Bodine : Either that or his lady friend scratched herself on his whiskers when she kissed him.
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Jed Clampett : I declare, this is the nosiest family a man was ever burdened with.
Daisy Moses : Well lookit them shoes, all fresh oiled.
Elly May Clampett : Fancy new laces, too!
Cousin Pearl Bodine : And them's his best socks.
Jethro Bodine : And it ain't even Sunday.
Cousin Pearl Bodine : Son, every day's Sunday when you're in love.
Jed Clampett : Now that takes the rag offen the bush. I ain't in love and I just oiled my shoes 'cause they was squeakin'.
Daisy Moses : They been squeakin' for 15 years as I remember. You ain't never oiled 'em.
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Daisy Moses : [to Jed] It ain't what you got, it's what you ain't got, that's ailing you.
Jed Clampett : Well, what is it we ain't got?
Daisy Moses : I could tell you in three words: fe-male company.