Cheers (TV Series)

Woody for Hire, Meets Norman of the Apes (1988)

Woody Harrelson: Woody Boyd

Photos 

Quotes 

• Sam Malone : What are you doing there?

  Woody Boyd : Miss Howe put Moi in charge of refreshments for the book club.

  Sam Malone : [points]  Yeah, but what are those?

  Woody Boyd : Finger sandwiches. You know the part that takes so much time is getting that middle knuckle right.

• Sam Malone : What are you doing, Woody?

  Woody Boyd : [rubbing his hands together]  I'm wringing my hands with guilt.

  Sam Malone : Oh. I don't think I've ever seen that before. Why?

  Woody Boyd : I told a terrible lie to the guys, Sam.

  Sam Malone : Oh, you mean about being on that TV show?

  Woody Boyd : No, that was true, but I got a telephone call, and I pretended it was Robert Urich on the other end. I mean I didn't hurt anybody or anything, although your plumber seemed a little confused.

  Sam Malone : Well, don't worry about it. I'm sure everyone will forgive you.

  Woody Boyd : But it was a lie Sam, and I've never told a lie before.

  Sam Malone : What?

  Woody Boyd : No, no, wait, that's a lie. I told a lie. Now that's two lies. See how much easier it gets.

  [sobbing] 

  Woody Boyd : Oh my God, I'm out of control. What's next? Murder?