- Marie Barone: You smoke?
- Jennifer Whelan: I used to smoke.
- Debra Barone: Oh yeah everyone at her commune smoked. Sometimes those funny little cigarettes too.
- Frank Barone: You were a pot smoking hippie?
- Jennifer Whelan: It was just a place where people could live together and grow organic vegetables.
- Debra Barone: Naked.
- Marie Barone: You handled food naked?
- Ray Barone: That's what makes it organic.
- Frank Barone: [to Jennifer] It's so rare that I am able to talk to someone in your vocation. Which leads me to my question. What do you gals wear under there?
- Robert Barone: Deb, Deb, Deb, Deb. Deb.
- Debra Barone: What?
- Robert Barone: Don't pretend with me. I only know too well the pain of being number two.
- Debra Barone: What did Ray tell you?
- Robert Barone: About you and your sister? He doesn't have to tell me. I've seen that face before... in the mirror.
- Debra Barone: No, my sister and I don't have that kind of relationship.
- Robert Barone: Oh, no? Starts the first day they bring the new one home. There you are, innocently playing with your bongo monkey, all the relatives just oohing and aahing over the new little blessing, so cute, so - so precious. Then Mama's darling begins to cry. Someone comes up with the bright idea of giving him your bongo. That'll calm him down. And from that day forward, say goodbye to your monkey and assume the position. You are now number two.
- Debra Barone: I'm the younger one, Robert.
- Robert Barone: What's that?
- Debra Barone: I'm the youngest. They would be giving me the bongo monkey.
- Robert Barone: Oh. Well, it's just a very general story intended to illuminate the human condition.
- Debra Barone: Thank you.
- Robert Barone: Give me more than Ray.
- Jennifer Whelan: I know you can't believe it, but I happen to be serious about this.
- Debra Barone: Why?
- Jennifer Whelan: What, why am I becoming a nun?
- Debra Barone: Yeah, why don't you tell me?
- Jennifer Whelan: Because I wanna be better than you.
- Debra Barone: Ray and Robert, they have this, like, completely screwed up relationship, but at least they have each other, you know? I mean, they fight, they compete and they blame their lives on their parents. They're real brothers.