- Pascale: [the Crucke family discusses the upcoming election, a battle between Balthasar Boma and Pico Coppens] You should watch what you say.
- Bieke: I know what I'm saying. I vote for Pico. How about you, dad?
- Oscar: Well, Pico is our best player.
- Pascale: And?
- Oscar: But Boma is our president.
- Pascale: And our landlord. Bieke, we run a cafe. We can't choose sides. Right, Oscar?
- Oscar: Well, it's to...
- Pascale: There you go. Your father says it, too. Personally, I'm in favour of Boma. At least, he's got style.
- Bieke: You're just afraid the blowhard is going to raise the rent. Cowards. What about democracy?
- Oscar: Democracy? You're living at our expense. You call that democracy?
- Boma: [first line in French] Bonjour tout le monde. This is me shaking everyone's hand. I have surprising news to share.
- Xavier: Are you getting married?
- Boma: Yes, Waterslaeghers. With my cleaning lady.
- [he laughs]
- Boma: What do you think of this?
- [he unveils his poster]
- Boma: Good, isn't it? Everyone says it. Oscar, hang it on the door for me.
- [Boma notices Pico's poster]
- Pico: That's right, Mr. Boma. I hope we'll fight a fair fight.
- Boma: Well, if it depends on me, then absolutely, colleague.
- Man #1: Cheers, Pico!
- Boma: Hey this is my treat, no?
- Bieke: No, Pico ordered first.
- Dimitri: We can drink two, can't we?
- Boma: Did I shake your hand already?
- [they shake hands]
- Boma: Now this is the first pork knuckle I get my hands on today. I need to ask you something later, alright.
- [Dimitri pulls his hand away, he's angry]
- Pascale: So exactly who's going to pay for that treat now?
- Boma: I'll show my good heart once more. Put it on Pico's bill and I'll pay for two rounds after training.
- [Pico's indignant]
- Boma: Oscar, hang my poster on that door, and take that off.
- Pico: Don't you dare, Oscar. Hey who do you think you are?
- Boma: [sharp-witted] The owner of this cafe.
- Bieke: A cafe is a public place.
- Pico: You're a dictator, that's who you are, mister Boma.
- Boma: Coppens, watch your words, would you lad?
- [the others stir up the atmosphere]
- Dimitri: What. I'm not saying anything, am I?
- [they have an argument about where to hang their posters, they talk over each other]
- Oscar: I'll hang them side by side.
- Boma: What's alluring about that, a black and white photo?
- Bieke: [sarcastically] Yeah, and Boma colors your day, right?
- Oscar: Lads! Time for training. C'mon, move, move. And you know it by now: no alcohol, no cigarettes. C'mon Pol. Did you bring your shoes? C'mon, lads. Move.
- [Boma sits with Dimitri]
- Boma: Dimitri, I'll have to run a strong campaign, you know.
- Dimitri: Yeah I can see that.
- Boma: I'll need a lot of material. The question is: 'Where should a person store that?'
- Dimitri: [laconically] That's the big problem.
- Boma: I was thinking about your garage.
- Dimitri: How do you mean? What about my fleet then?
- Boma: Those few rusty wrecks out there?
- Dimitri: Hey, hey. And will this be reimbursed?
- Boma: Sure.
- Dimitri: Then there's enough space.
- Boma: If I'm elected, you can count on my full support, alright.
- Dimitri: Pico has promised an asphalt road, you know.
- Boma: I guarantee you a tarmac road, with sewerage and everything. Where else would you go with your dirty oil?
- Dimitri: Is that allowed?
- Boma: You can't swear too, right? You can count on me. I'll give you a poster, hang it up in your garage. And make sure I don't see that schoolteacher with his silly little finger hanging in your garage, okay?
- Dimitri: No, don't worry.
- [but it is already too late for that]
- Oscar: [interviewed for Boma's radio] 'Balthazar Boma is the ideal team president for me. He's always been royally behind' - excuse me, 'loyally behind our team. I have my choice.' 'Made' - excuse me, 'I've made my choice.'
- [as Pico enters the cafe]
- Oscar: I vote for Boma.
- Pico: Thanks a lot, huh.
- Oscar: Or Pico.
- Pascale: Oscar, you have no character.
- Bieke: Oh, he has. That of a mussel.
- Oscar: Thanks for your input, Bea*trijs*. Besides, I have work to do.
- Marc: We'll cut that out. Now a short response from Xavier Waterloos.
- Xavier: No, *slaeghers*.
- Marc: Right, *slaeghers*.
- Xavier: 'To me, Boma is' - here, eat this!
- [he makes a dismissive gesture, rubbing his finger under his nose that he can forget about winning]
- Carmen: You'll regret that, you know!
- [Xavier leaves the table and sits with Pico, aligning himself with him]
- Boma: Cut! Cut, I said!
- Bieke: [talks in mic] 'That's demagoguery. Free radio is being misused to do politics. I demand that Pico also be given a fair chance, a confrontation'.
- Boma: [to Marc] Cut everything.
- [Marc is reluctant]
- Boma: You can have a confrontation the night before the election. Pascale, from now on everyone will drink at my expense.
- [general praise]
- Pico: [to Bieke and Doortje] I don't have the financial capacity to do what he does, treat the cafe like that.
- Bieke: You have other qualities, Pico. You need to approach people and ask them where you can help.
- Doortje: Good idea, and we'll do printing.
- Bieke: And you'll deliver it yourself.
- Xavier: Door to door.
- Doortje: We'll stick more posters. I'll go to Dimitri and ask him if we can use his station wagon to transport your equipment.
- Pico: That's a great idea, Doortje.
- Pascale: Bieke, serve the customers. Come on.
- Bieke: Mom, I'm busy here.
- [phone rings]
- Pascale: Hello, this is F.C. De Kampioenen's clubhouse. Yes? Boma! It's for you.
- [he takes over the call]
- Boma: Hello, Balthasar Boma, second placed on Municipal Interest's list? What?
- [scene shifts; Dimitri is the caller, from his office]
- Dimitri: Yeah so it was the justice of peace - Does it mean I'm the Acting Returning Officer? That's not just for everyone, is it? And I have to find my assessors myself then? No problem. Ah, you'll be coming to my place? Alright, see you in a while then.
- [ends the call]
- Dimitri: Stay calm, Dimitri. Keep your wits about you.
- [Dimitri closes the slats between which Pico's poster hangs and reveals Boma's poster but Doortje enters and spots it]
- Doortje: You are one big hypocrite, you are.
- Dimitri: What?
- Doortje: The posters? You're in cahoots with Boma, aren't you? Admit it!
- Dimitri: No, Doortje. I'm the Acting Returning Officer, you see. So I have to be neutral. A little bit of Pico here, a little bit of Boma there.
- Doortje: Coward. How much does he pay you?
- Dimitri: Nothing. You don't have to get so mad, you know. I have something very important to ask.
- Doortje: I'm curious.
- Dimitri: I don't know if I'm allowed to ask, 'cause Pico's your husband. But what I wanted to ask was if you wanted to be a *concubine* by any chance?
- [he confused assessor "bijzitter" with concubine "bijzit", she slaps him; she leaves]
- Dimitri: [invalid voting scene] 'De Backer Pascale Melanie Eugène'?
- Pascale: That's right. Dimitri, my convocation letter, please. Thanks.
- [she leaves]
- Dimitri: [to Carmen] Your convocation letter.
- Carmen: I left it in the car. Give me a moment.
- Xavier: The tip of the pencil has broken off.
- Dimitri: Here, take my Biro.
- Xavier: The pencil tore the paper, so this is invalid. Can I get another form?
- Dimitri: Alright, I'll make an exception for you.
- [he gives him a new form, the voting booths are full]
- Dimitri: [to Bieke] Go back.
- [Boma arrives]
- Boma: [in French] Bonjour, Dimitri.
- Pico: Excuse me, Mr. President, line up like everyone else.
- Dimitri: Leave the man alone, would you Pico? He has other work, you know.
- Pico: That could be.
- [they close the queue nonetheless]
- Boma: You voted for me, didn't you Pascale?
- Pascale: Of course, Balthasar.
- [Carmen returns]
- Carmen: Here's my letter.
- [opens Oscar's booth]
- Dimitri: Oscar? There's other people waiting.
- Oscar: Have some patience, and let me think for a second.
- Dimitri: Oscar, I'll count down from five and then you must've voted. Understood?
- Dimitri: Five!
- [he leaves the booth]
- Doortje: Finally.
- [he is about to cast his vote, he delays]
- Oscar: One moment, okay.
- [he returns to the booth]
- Dimitri: [to Carmen] How 'bout your passport?
- Carmen: You know who I am, fool, don't you?
- Dimitri: Carmen, I don't know anyone. Give me your passport.
- Carmen: What kind of nonsense is this?
- Xavier: Carmen, wait. Dimitri, you still have mine, right?
- Dimitri: Sure. 'Waterslaeghers Xavier Michel Jean-Marie'?
- [he laughs]
- Xavier: Yeah that's it. Alright, so here's your passport and bring it yourself next time.
- Dimitri: Let's move on. 'Vandormael Carmen Virginie Philomène'.
- [he laughs]
- Carmen: Hey what kind of comedy is this, uh?
- [she votes blank, she is angry]
- Dimitri: That'll cost you a lawsuit. You have to enter one of the voting booths.
- Bieke: Yes, Carmen. That's the name of the law.
- Carmen: Shut up, silly sheep. Alright, give me a new form. I'll show you what I do with it.
- [Carmen enters Oscar's voting booth by accident, enters the other instantly leaves]
- Carmen: Take this, returning officer of kiss my ass.
- [votes blank again]
- Dimitri: Zal 't gaan, ja!
- Oscar: Hey how's one supposed to concentrate here?
- Dimitri: Back in your cage!