Frasier (TV Series)

The 1000th Show (1997)

David Hyde Pierce: Dr. Niles Crane

Photos 

Quotes 

• Niles : I'm surprised the trains are even running on "Frasier Crane Day".

• Frasier : Where was I?

  Niles : You were last seen hiking up Mount Ego.

• Niles : Sorry I'm late, I stopped half way to listen to a jolly band of Frasier Crane Day carolers. I tried to join in on "The Twelve Days Of Frasier" but forgot the words around day seven. How does it go again?

  Frasier : I believe it's "seven snobs a' sniping."

• Niles : That man tried to assault me with a fish!

• Frasier : Niles, give me your phone, I'll have Roz send us a car!

  Niles : My phone? What do you think the mugger was reaching into my breast pocket for? Well, the consolation is that he jabbed himself on my emergency sewing kit.

• Niles : Everyone deserves a fuss. You above all. You've helped a lot of people, they deserve a chance to thank you for it.

  Frasier : Thank you, Niles.

• Frasier : [Wearing a newly bought pair of shoes]  Well, these are quite handsome. Even if they are just a bit snug.

  Niles : We could always go back. I think there's a pair in there you DIDN'T try on.

• Frasier : [Looking out from an alley]  Oh, for God's sake, Niles, will you come outta there?

  Niles : Our mugger specifically instructed us to wait for five minutes.

  Frasier : Yes, well if he wanted us to time it exactly, he wouldn't have taken our watches!

• Frasier : He was waving at me!

  Niles : He was waving for a cab to get away from the scary 'I'm listening' man