- [to the woman whose baby Chandler and Monica want to adopt]
- Chandler: My wife's an incredible woman. She's loving and devoted and caring. And don't tell her I said this, but the woman's always right... I love my wife more than anything in this world. And I... it kills me that I can't give her a baby... I really want a kid. And when that day finally comes, I'll learn how to be a good dad. But my wife... she's already there. She's a mother... without a baby... Please?
- Phoebe Buffay: So Joey's out with my friend the other night and she reaches over and takes some of his fries...
- Rachel Green: Oh, no.
- Phoebe Buffay: You know about the plate thing?
- Rachel Green: Oh, yeah. Joey doesn't share food. I remember the other day it was breakfast and I had some grapes on my plate.
- Phoebe Buffay: [to Joey] You wouldn't let her share a grape?
- Rachel Green: Oh, no, not me. Emma.
- Monica Geller-Bing: Why couldn't I have been a reverend?
- Chandler: You're Jewish.
- Monica Geller-Bing: Technicality!