The Golden Girls (TV Series)

The Way We Met (1986)

Bea Arthur: Dorothy Zbornak

Quotes 

• Rose Nylund : This is exactly what happened during the Great Herring War.

  Blanche Devereaux : The Great Herring War?

  Rose Nylund : Yes, between the Lindstroms and the Johanssons.

  Dorothy Petrillo-Zbornak : Oh, THAT Great Herring War.

  Rose Nylund : The two families controlled the most fertile herring waters off the coast of Norway, so naturally, it seemed like it would be in their best interest to band together. Oh, boy, was that a mistake. You see, they couldn't agree on what to do with the herring.

  Dorothy Petrillo-Zbornak : Oh, well that's understandable. I mean, the possibilities are overwhelming.

  Rose Nylund : Exactly. The Johanssons wanted to pickle the herring, and the Lindstroms wanted to train them for the circus.

  Blanche Devereaux : Weren't they kind of hard to see riding on the elephants?

  Rose Nylund : Oh, not that kind of circus. A herring circus. Sort of like Sea World, only smaller. Much, much smaller. But bigger than a flea circus.

  Dorothy Petrillo-Zbornak : Uh, tell me, Rose, um... Ah-ha ha ha!... Did they ever shoot a herring out of a cannon?

  Rose Nylund : Only once. But they shot him into a tree. After that no other herring would do it.

• Rose Nylund : I'll make it up to you, Dorothy. I promise. Listen, if there's ever a night where you can't sleep, I'll come to your room and sing "Kumbaya."

  Dorothy Petrillo-Zbornak : Rose, I don't know what to say. Yes I do... Don't ever do that.

• Dorothy Petrillo-Zbornak : [Sophia's just scared them brandishing a butcher knife and screaming]  Ma, that is NOT funny!

  Sophia Petrillo : Are you kidding, it's a riot! I pulled that one on old man Peterson after they showed 'Psycho' at the home. They said he would never walk again. He walked! Well, good night.

  [waves the knife around] 

  Sophia Petrillo : Sweet dreams!

  [exits kitchen laughing maniacally]