- Wes Durham: This a pretty good job?
- Hec Ramsey, Deputy Sheriff: Spirits, bacon and beans... steak twice a week.
- Wes Durham: Hangman's wages. You ain't gettin' no younger. What happens when the miseries curl up your fingers?
- Hec Ramsey, Deputy Sheriff: I'll steal fewer drinks.
- Wes Durham: What if some young punk calls you out and yer packin' about a pound of slugs in ya?
- Hec Ramsey, Deputy Sheriff: Well, I can always burst into tears.
- Wes Durham: And then give him a mealy mouth grin so's he'll buy you a drink.
- Hec Ramsey, Deputy Sheriff: Hey, Wes, maybe they gonna put me out ta stud.
- Wes Durham: Hec... there's five thousand dollards in gold to bust me outta here.
- Hec Ramsey, Deputy Sheriff: You offerin' me a livin' legend for five thousand dollars?
- Wes Durham: What are ya askin'?
- Hec Ramsey, Deputy Sheriff: I'm not askin' nothin'.
- Wes Durham: Six thousand.
- Hec Ramsey, Deputy Sheriff: No.
- Wes Durham: I won't offer it agin.
- Hec Ramsey, Deputy Sheriff: I guess I got this talent for poverty, Wes.
- Chief Oliver Stamp: You made any progress?
- Hec Ramsey: I can tell you this: He is one smart fella and that's a fact.
- Chief Oliver Stamp: [sarcastically] Oh, that's what I call progress. How do you know that?
- Hec Ramsey: Well, for the one thing, he used a shotgun. Can't compare ballistics on buckshot. For another, he used the busiest road in the county. Pretty hard to trail him in the middle of that. And, then the victim - perfect stranger, just the first person that happened to pass by and no motive. And, finally, nobody can spell that bad 'cept a smart man on purpose.
- Wes Durham: Mother always said I'd wind up at the end of a rope.
- Hec Ramsey: Well, all due respect to your mother, the Town Council - Doc here abstainin' - has decided that a character of your purple reputation bein' executed by electrocution is gonna strike terror to the black heart of every outlaw from here to Texas.
- Wes Durham: [chuckles] You believe that?
- Hec Ramsey: [laughs] Hell, no. Should be nice if it did, though.
- Hec Ramsey: You couldn't track a freight train. Now, why are you so hell-bent on me havin' company?
- Chief Oliver Stamp: Hangover from my school-teaching days. Always had a soft spot in my heart for the dumbest kid in class.
- Ivy Turnwright: Hey, Doctor, what's your opinion of this, uh, electrical chair?
- Doc Amos B. Coogan: Well, it's a handsome piece of furniture. I don't know as I'd, uh, want it in my front parlor.
- Ivy Turnwright: You think it's a humane form of execution?
- Doc Amos B. Coogan: Well, I guess the people who could answer that aren't talkin'.
- Shopkeeper: Fine deputy we've got. Killer on the loose out there and he's in here buyin' stationary.
- Chief Oliver Stamp: You're out of uniform.
- Hec Ramsey: Oh, sorry. Well, I don't like to play poker when I'm wearin' my badge.
- Chief Oliver Stamp: What are you doing playing poker at this time of day?
- Hec Ramsey: Just amplifying my very small income.
- Chief Oliver Stamp: Shouldn't you be out patrolling the street?
- Hec Ramsey: Well, this many folks in town, the trouble may end up in the street, but it usually starts in the saloon.
- Lionel Harlock: What would a clod like you know of immortality?
- Nathan Shotness: "Clod?" There were clods on this earth before you got here. There be one less after you're gone.