Hogan's Heroes (TV Series)
The Schultz Brigade (1966)
Werner Klemperer: Col. Klink
Photos
Quotes
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Col. Wilhelm Klink : Schultz, call Col. Hogan.
Sgt. Hans Georg Schultz : COLONEL HOGAAAAAAAAAAN!
Col. Wilhelm Klink : No, go GET him!
Sgt. Hans Georg Schultz : Jawohl.
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Col. Robert E. Hogan : Sweetest set-up in the whole German army, and you wanted to be a general!
Col. Wilhelm Klink : Hogan, every man in my class has made general.
Col. Robert E. Hogan : How many of them killed in action.
Col. Wilhelm Klink : Quite a few.
Col. Robert E. Hogan : How many of them shot by the Führer?
Col. Wilhelm Klink : Quite a few more.
Col. Robert E. Hogan : And you couldn't be happy.
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Col. Robert E. Hogan : Two shots muffled. They've killed themselves. Come on, let's go.
Sgt. Hans Georg Schultz : [from behind a barrel] Col. Hogan, if they are dead, what is the hurry?
Col. Wilhelm Klink : Schultz, you're a coward! Now, you go first!
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[Klink asks Hogan for advice on avoiding marital entanglements to Burkhalter's sister]
Col. Robert E. Hogan : Tell ya what'cha gotta do. Give her the old soldier routine - you may be sent off to battle any minute, your life is not your own, it's not fair to the little woman... You know.
Col. Wilhelm Klink : Excellent! Excellent! Wait, she knows that I am permanently stationed at Stalag 13.
Col. Robert E. Hogan : Easy. Tell her you're involved in a plot against Hitler.
Col. Wilhelm Klink : Shh! Shh! I'm not, I'm not. That would be sure death. Why would *I* say such a thing?
Col. Robert E. Hogan : You might figure it was worth it. Have fun, Kommandant.
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Col. Wilhelm Klink : [hesitant against turning against Burkhalter] Did I tell you that I almost married the General's sister?
Colonel Burmeister : [angrily] We ALL almost married the General's sister.
Colonel Bussie : Congratulations on your narrow escape.
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Col. Wilhelm Klink : Hogan, I never realized, deep down, how you must love me.
Col. Robert E. Hogan : Not just me, sir. All the men.
Col. Wilhelm Klink : All the men. I must live for THEM.
Col. Robert E. Hogan : Would be a help, sir.
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Colonel Burmeister : [to Klink] You command Stalag 13, I command Stalag 10, unt Bussie commands Stalag 19. General Burkhalter commands us. Now, if all three of us denounce him to the Gestapo - uh, separately but with the same complaint - then he will be deposed and one of us will be made general in his place.
Col. Wilhelm Klink : Ha-ha. But that's only one chance out of three.
Colonel Bussie : What chance do you have now?
Col. Wilhelm Klink : [after a thought] Considerably less.
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Col. Wilhelm Klink : [going over the plot against Burkhalter] Eh, what complaint did we agree on?
Colonel Bussie : He's forcing us to give him forty percent from the prisoners' food allowance.
Col. Wilhelm Klink : Forty percent.
Colonel Burmeister : Unt the Gestapo knows that he pays them only on the basis of collecting thirty percent from us. Naturally they will not tolerate dishonesty.
Col. Wilhelm Klink : Naturally. I mention he was my best friend?
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General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter : You have become very social, you three.
Col. Wilhelm Klink : Oh, it's just a discussion of prison problems, General Burkhalter. We never stop trying to build better mousetraps.
General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter : You take me for a fool, Klink? Do you not know that I have my sources of information? Vhen I see my colonels getting together for a little chat, I know what they are talking about - a plot... to replace me.
[the three colonels talk over each other to deny this]
General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter : Stop pretending! I only want to know one thing - who will save his skin by informing on the other two?
Col. Wilhelm Klink : I believe that General Burkhalter knows that, as a man of honor, I would never inform on my fellows officers were I involved in a conspiracy; however, since I'm completely innocent and it was all the idea of Bussie and Bermeister...
[Bussie vehemently berates Klink about it being all his idea while Bermeister denies involvement]
General der Infanterie Albert Burkhalter : Quiet! You're all under arrest in quarters. I will see that you get a fair trial immediately, after which you will be shot.
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Col. Robert E. Hogan : Call me as a witness.
Col. Wilhelm Klink : Why? You don't know anything about this.
Col. Robert E. Hogan : That's right, but my mind won't be cluttered with a lot of facts.