- Selma: And while we're talking, that was some crummy wedding gift you sent us - 2 dozen paper plates.
- Jack Benny: Selma
- Selma: This is a marriage, not a picnic.
- Stuart Canin: [about Fred Allen] He said for a man of your wealth, you were really very modest.
- Jack Benny: Modest? Fred said that about me?
- Stuart Canin: Yes. He said that you could be in a cocktail lounge all night with Jack Benny and you'd never know he had a quarter.
- Charlie: Mr. Benny, this is my wife, Selma.
- Jack Benny: Well Selma, I'm very glad to meet you and I want to say you've got yourself a fine man, here. You know, I'm vey very fond of him. He's been working for me for 15 years.
- Selma: I know. How come you never gave him a raise?