- Louise Jefferson: George, the Lord created everybody equal... except in your case He quit work before He got to your head!
- George Jefferson: Listen, I wear the pants in this family...
- Louise Jefferson: And when you zip them up, include your mouth!
- [last lines]
- Florence Johnston: But there's just one thing. You folks mind if I ask you something?
- Louise Jefferson: No, go right ahead.
- Florence Johnston: You live in this apartment, right?
- Louise Jefferson: Uh-huh.
- Florence Johnston: [to Helen] And you got an apartment in this building, too?
- Helen Willis: Yes, that's right.
- Florence Johnston: Well, how come we overcame and nobody told me?
- Louise Jefferson: George, why do we have to fight so much? If we have a problem, why can't we just talk it through like Tom and Helen? They don't fight.
- George Jefferson: They don't fight, 'cause they're scared to fight.
- Helen Willis: What's that supposed to mean?
- George Jefferson: You know damn well what it means! If you two ever really started going at each other, inside of five minutes, he'd be calling you...
- Helen Willis: Don't say it!
- George Jefferson: Nigger!
- Helen Willis: He said it!
- Tom Willis: Now, you listen to me! We've had lots of fights, and it's never happened!
- George Jefferson: Oh, and don't tell me it's never crossed your mind!
- Helen Willis: No more than it's ever crossed my mind to say the word "honky" to Tom.
- George Jefferson: Ha! Well, how come you said it just then?