- Kahn Souphanousinphone, Sr.: Khan junior! What is that noise you're making? It sounds like you're killing a seagull with a bagpipe.
- Hank Hill: It's bluegrass, Khan. Music made in America.
- Connie Souphanousinphone: I'm having more fun than a dog up a bone tree. That's how you say it's fun in bluegrass.
- Kahn Souphanousinphone, Sr.: Bah! That inbred music is designed so only people with 6 fingers can play it.
- Kahn Souphanousinphone, Sr.: Your path is Van Cliburn camp to Harvard to New York Philharmonic, not hay wagon to Hee Haw.