- June Cleaver: Ward, I wish Wally wouldn't use words like 'flakey' and 'kooky'.
- Ward Cleaver: Well, Dear, you wouldn't want all of his friends to think he was creepy, would you?
- The Beaver: [Beaver and Whitey are discussing Miss Landers getting married] Hey, Whitey, after your brother got married, he and his wife had some... babies, didn't they?
- Whitey Whitney: Sure! I'm a two-time uncle even!
- The Beaver: Do you think Miss Landers might have any babies?
- Whitey Whitney: Sure she might.
- The Beaver: Boy, Whitey. All these years I've been thinking teachers were something special. Well, now they turn out to be nothing but parents.
- Ward Cleaver: [phone rings] I'll get it. Hello?
- Whitey Whitney: Hello, Mr. Cleaver? This is Whitey Whitney. I wondered if I could talk to Beaver, if you're not busy yelling at him or anything.
- Ward Cleaver: Why yes, I think so. Just a minute, I'll call him.
- [to Beaver offstage]
- Ward Cleaver: Beaver! Telephone!
- The Beaver: [from offstage] Okay, Dad!
- Ward Cleaver: He'll be right here.
- [to June]
- Ward Cleaver: It's, uh, that little friend of Beaver's, uh, you know, the one who always talks like he's just been frightened by something?
- June Cleaver: Whitey Whitney?
- Ward Cleaver: Precisely.
- Ward Cleaver: June! June, where are you?
- June Cleaver: What is it dear, what do you want?
- Ward Cleaver: Dear, I've just been in the garage. Who has been at my tools?
- June Cleaver: Well, I wouldn't touch them. I know what an old grouch you are about them.
- Ward Cleaver: Thanks.