- Carlos Ramon: [after Ralphie places the bus next to the partly covered scab on his knee] It's a short cut. Get it, short cut?
- Phoebe Terese, Arnold Perlstein, Dorothy Ann, Keesha Franklin: Carlos, yuck!
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Excellent observation, Carlos. Seatbelts, everyone!
- Ralphie Tennelli: [after the bus enters his mouth to get to his throat; muffled] Cool. I've never seen that from the outside before.
- Ralphie Tennelli: [pulling back his bandage to reveal his partly clotted scab] Is it just me, or does it say - this way in?
- Ralphie Tennelli: [seeing the rest of the class setting up their TV equipment in his room] Is it just me, or is my entire class standing in my room?
- Keesha Franklin: The FNN news team is nearing the disaster area.
- [the bus plunges down Ralphie's throat to get to his vocal cords]
- Keesha Franklin: In a moment we'll have live footage.
- Ralphie Tennelli: [typing at his computer; first lines] I told them I'd have an idea for broadcast day.
- [coughs]
- Ralphie Tennelli: So I'll have an idea for broadcast day.
- [coughs more]
- Ralphie Tennelli: Why don't I have an idea for broadcast day?
- Wanda Li: [in shock over Ralphie's absence on broadcast day] We can't do it without him!
- Carlos Ramon: And we go on in an hour!
- Dorothy Ann, Tim Jamal, Keesha Franklin: Where *is* he?
- Ralphie Tennelli: If I get an idea, I'll still have time to phone it in.
- [continues typing at his computer]
- Ralphie Tennelli: That's it, a phone-in!
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: [speaking into a megaphone from the bus] Ah, it was your idea, Ralphie. We're here to get the inside story.
- Ralphie Tennelli: Inside story? Inside what? What about broadcast day?
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Think, Ralphie. Where is all the action right now?
- Ralphie Tennelli: The action?
- [Liz squeezes his nose to try to see what's going on down his throat]
- Ralphie Tennelli: Liz, what're you doing? Hang on a second - the action is all inside me. What a great idea. Broadcast day could about what's going on inside me.
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Excellent, Ralphie.
- [rolling her tongue]
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Rrrrrrrrrroll tape!
- Dorothy Ann: Could we travel through his bloodstream to get to his throat?
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Absolutely, Dorothy Ann.
- [rhythmically]
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: We'll take the Trans-Ralphie Highway System, and here we go! Wahoo!
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Ah, now that we're inside Ralphie's throat tissue, time for some on-the-spot reporting - up close and personal.
- Arnold Perlstein: Is Ralphie staying home from school today, Ms. Frizzle?
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Yes, I'm afraid so, Arnold.
- Wanda Li: [worrying, then shaking Arnold] What're we gonna do, what're we gonna do, what're we gonna do?
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Why, we're taking school to him, of course! To the bus!
- Ralphie Tennelli: This is Ralphie for FNN News. My entire class has just dived deep into my cut, and it doesn't even hurt!
- Tim Jamal: What are those?
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Those are tiny, tiny blood vessels. They're all part of the bloodstream.
- [casts a spell to shrink the bus to fit into one of Ralphie's blood vessels]
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: Eeny-meeny-miny-moooooooooe!
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: [as she enlarges the bus back to its size big enough for everyone else to interview Ralphie one last time, after he sneezes them out] Second floor, boy's socks - going up!
- Dorothy Ann: Are we doing broadcast day from Ralphie's room, Ms. Frizzle?
- Ms. Valerie Frizzle: What better place to take chances, make mistakes...?
- Carlos Ramon: And it sure is - messy!
- Keesha Franklin: [after she and the rest of the class have been enlarged after Ralphie sneezes them out, she heads to Ralphie to interview him one last time] This is Keesha still reporting to you live from FNN. We are now back in Ralphie's room.