Married... with Children (TV Series)

What I Did for Love (1992)

Ed O'Neill: Al Bundy

Photos 

Quotes 

• Seven : What's the difference between men and women?

  Al Bundy : One works... and the other's a woman.

  Seven : So Mrs. D'Arcy is a man?

  Al Bundy : [smiles]  Yes!

  Seven : Then Mr. D'Arcy is a woman?

  Al Bundy : Yes!

  Seven : No wonder you sell shoes.

  Al Bundy : [beat]  Yes.

• Peggy Bundy : Which reminds me, Al, I want sex.

  Al Bundy : So do I, but I see no reason to drag you into it.

• Al Bundy : Peg, you're down here. I must've been dreaming you ran off with that dwarf down at the bookstore, and that I'm living in sin with a Playmate centerfold and her eight roommates who can speak, but choose not to.

• Al Bundy : Well, there's nothing appetizing under there at all. Now, Peg, if you expect me to pleasure you, I'm gonna need the same thing that Robert Mitchum needs.

  Peggy Bundy : A jowl-tightening?

  Al Bundy : No. Beef, baby. Lay it on me!

  Peggy Bundy : Al, do you know that I cooked four hours for that five minutes of sex we had? It's just not worth it.

• Al Bundy : Choco cake! Choco cake! Eat so much you get a tummy ache!

• Peggy Bundy : Al, can you honestly look me in the eye and tell me that this does not turn you on?

  Al Bundy : Well, Peg, I can look you in the anywhere and say that.

• Peggy Bundy : Al, this isn't normal. Everybody else has sex.

  Al Bundy : [chuckles]  Everybody else has sex. What are you doing, looking in windows?

  Peggy Bundy : Yes, I do! And everybody else has sex.