- Wilbur Post: Ed, I haven't got time to play games. Mr. Banning wants to go for a ride.
- Mister Ed: Tell him to throw a saddle over a taxi.
- Wilbur Post: He is not that heavy.
- Mister Ed: Oh, no? He's got fat in places where you're not even supposed to have places.
- Wilbur Post: Ed, you're exaggerating.
- Mister Ed: Oh, yeah? If you put us both on a seesaw, my feet would never touch the ground.