- Scooter: Say, we've got a very special show planned for you tonight. You're gonna love it!
- Phyllis George: Are you sure about that?
- Scooter: Oh, I guarantee. It's exciting, suspenseful...
- Phyllis George: Is it funny?
- Scooter: ...the guarantee just ran out.
- Phyllis George: Rowlf, it's about this song.
- Rowlf: Yeah? What about it?
- Phyllis George: Well, it's a little weird.
- Rowlf: Yeah, I'm sorry about that. I wanted a song that was very weird, but this was the best I could find.
- Nurse Janice: [Pigs in Space is competing against Veterinarian's Hospital for the Best Sketch Award] Nurse Piggy, you're in both sketches. You can't lose.
- Nurse Piggy: Gee. You're right. Eh. Not much point in going on.