- [first lines]
- Jessica Fletcher: Daniel!
- Daniel O'Brien: Jessica, what are you doing? You nearly ran into me.
- Jessica Fletcher: Don't you have that a little bit backwards?
- Daniel O'Brien: I guess I do.
- Jessica Fletcher: [at the Founder's Day picnic] Well, how does this sound? "Captain Joshua Wayne, a free-spirited adventurer who seized opportunities wherever he could find them."
- Lois: Jessica, he was a pirate.
- Jessica Fletcher: Well. I'm trying to state that as delicately as I can.
- Lois: You don't have to do that. We've always been very proud of Captain Wayne and his Yankee gumption.
- Jessica Fletcher: And nobody cares that he fought on the British side in the Revolutionary War?
- Lois: [shocked] He didn't?
- Jessica Fletcher: He most certainly did!
- Lois: [grabs Jessica's arm and lowers her voice] Jessica, you certainly can't let that get around.
- [last lines]
- Capt. Ethan Cragg: I'm sorry to eat and run, Jess, but they're having a tournament on that arcade game, and since I am the current record holder, I feel obliged to defend my title.
- Jessica Fletcher: Well, dishes can wait. Would you mind if I competed?
- Capt. Ethan Cragg: You? It really would be kind of a waste of a good quarter.
- Jessica Fletcher: Well, maybe. But I better warn you. I've been practicing a little.
- Capt. Ethan Cragg: Practicing? How much practicing?