- Crow T. Robot: Increasingly paranoid, Santa's obsession with security begins to hinder everyday operations.
- [singing]
- Tom Servo: It's the devil's theme, his stupid little song, even though he's the embodiment of evil he's still got a goofy song, in his tights he brings death, despair, destruction and disease, now let's all join him. Devil.
- Crow T. Robot: [Santa is reading letters] Dear Santa Claus: Please bring me a little brother.' Oh ho ho ho. Can do. Can do.
- Narrator: [in film] Children from the USA...
- Crow T. Robot: ...are too spoiled and lazy to help Santa!