Queer as Folk (TV Series)

Tweaked-Out, Fucked-Out Crystal Queen (2003)

Robert Gant: Professor Ben Bruckner

Quotes 

• [Michael, Ben and Hunter just spoke to a high-school principal about Hunter returning to school] 

  Professor Ben Bruckner : At least now we finally get to know all about you.

  Michael : Name?

  James 'Hunter' Montgomery : Hunter.

  Michael : Hunter what?

  James 'Hunter' Montgomery : Just hunter.

  Michael : You think you're an aging rock diva?

  James 'Hunter' Montgomery : Last names tend to get in the way of my work.

  Professor Ben Bruckner : Wait, from now on, the only work you're doing is homework. Out with it.

  James 'Hunter' Montgomery : James Hunter Montgomery.

  Michael : Nice to meet you, jimmy.

  James 'Hunter' Montgomery : Shut up.

  Professor Ben Bruckner : When were you born?

  James 'Hunter' Montgomery : I wasn't born. My mother was too drunk to give birth, So i was delivered, 16 glorious years ago last tuesday.

  Michael : Last tuesday? You had a birthday last week and you didn't tell us?

  Professor Ben Bruckner : We could've done something to celebrate.

  James 'Hunter' Montgomery : Like blow out a candle? I blew three tricks that day. Made 150 bucks. That's what I call celebrating.

• Michael : Still searching for that exquisite turn of phrase that in five words or less expresses the essence of what your character's feeling?

  Professor Ben Bruckner : I'm frustrated as shit.

  Michael : Only four, congratulations.