Photos
Quotes
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Arnold Rimmer : When you're younger you can eat what you like, drink what you like, and still climb into your 26" waist trousers and zip them closed. Then you reach that age, 24-25, your muscles give up, they wave a little white flag, and without any warning at all you're suddenly a fat bastard
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Lister : Hey guys, it's half ten, aren't we playing poker?
Rimmer : Where have you been? Did you get the message?
Lister : What message?
Rimmer : One of the skutters has gone bananas, it's completely rewired the maintenance decks back to front and upside down, we've got over two thousand wiring faults, don't breath, don't touch anything. The whole ship's a gigantic booby trap.
Lister : No poker then?
Rimmer : We can't find the auto destruct system, it's wired up to something, but we don't know what, tell the Cat.
Lister : It's taken me ages to mark these cards.
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[Rimmer is threatening to shoot himself in Lister's body]
Rimmer : Go ahead, punks. Make my day.
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Rimmer : Look, I know it's a stupid idea and there's a high chance of you being a gibbering vegetable for the rest of your life, but if the rest of your life's only 30 seconds, what the hell?
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Lister : [Rimmer & Lister are returned to their own bodies] How many cigars did you get through, Rimmer? Me lungs feel like they've been through a cheese grater!
Rimmer : Look, you've got your body back, leave me alone.
Lister : I only have a couple of rollies a day! It feels like you've smoked an entire Cuban tobacco harvest!
Rimmer : I had the odd one!
Lister : No respect that's what. You've shown my body no respect whatsoever, you've treated it like smeg!
[feeling his pecs]
Lister : Look, you've given me breasts. There's a distinct cleavage there! One week in my body and you've given me a bosom!
