Roseanne (TV Series)

Into That Good Night, Part I (1997)

Roseanne Barr: Roseanne Conner

Photos 

Quotes 

• Roseanne Conner : We need to stop praying in dark corners and start praying like we fight, out loud and in public where everybody can see us.

• Dan Conner : We better finish getting ready for the baby's arrival.

  Roseanne Conner : Say that again.

  Dan Conner : Roseanne and Dan's granddaughter is coming home - LET'S GET READY TO RUUUUUUUUUMBLE!

• Roseanne Conner : [D.J.'s pressed against the wall and about to fall off the bed which moved out underneath him]  Is this like a religious thing?

  D.J. Conner : A little help here!

• Jackie Harris : Alright, that's it, Roseanne, four bottles of pine cleanser and two cans of Lemon Pledge.

  [imitating Poltergeist] 

  Jackie Harris : This house is clean!

  D.J. Conner : [comes down in rubber gloves and a rag on his head]  Okay, I got the bathroom clean as a whistle, okay that sandpaper and bleach goes a long way.

  Roseanne Conner : Hey, good job, now get on the phone and tell everybody we're having a welcome-home party for the baby and they gotta get here before the house gets dirty again. Hey, and if you're gonna wear that thing on your head, make me some pancakes.

• Jackie Harris : Can you believe it, Roseanne? We're bringing another baby home!

  Roseanne Conner : This is a lucky house. It adapts well to new life.

  Jackie Harris : I can't imagine this family living anywhere else.

  Roseanne Conner : Yep, lottery or no, I could never get rid of this house.

• D.J. Conner : Mark wants to know if he should score a keg.

  Roseanne Conner : No, I'll strap the baby on the back of my Harley and take her on her first beer run myself.

• Roseanne Conner : Is this all the T-shirts you have for the baby?

  Darlene Conner-Healy : Yeah, why, do I need more?

  Roseanne Conner : Well yeah, I had twice this many when you were a baby, of course half of them were your father's old socks.

• Darlene Conner-Healy : [bringing Harris home for the first time]  So what do you think of the joint?

  Roseanne Conner : What's not to like? At least she's not under that grow-bulb anymore.

• Roseanne Conner : And then I was thinking this rocking chair here should be right in front of the window so you can sit there, feed the baby and then look out and yell at the neighbor kids to stay off your lawn.

  Darlene Conner-Healy : Well, Mom, I don't want to turn into you all at once.

  Roseanne Conner : Take a big fat look in the mirror, Darlene, you lost.

• Dan Conner : Could use a little more work but I think Darlene and David and the baby will be comfortable here for a month or two or whenever they go back to Chicago.

  Roseanne Conner : Yep, what could Chicago have to offer them, besides culture and excitement?