- Bubba Bexley: Hey, that Western Union guy sounded pretty upset.
- Fred G. Sanford: What did he say?
- Bubba Bexley: He said it stopped raining in the house, but the drip was still there.
- Announcer: [Opening narration]
- [Showing both]
- Announcer: This is the beach, this is a palm tree,
- [cut to a shot of Fred trying to hula dance]
- Announcer: and this is a coconut.
- [laughter]
- Lamont Sanford: [while on the beach, he hands Fred a bowl] Here, Pop. Try this.
- Fred G. Sanford: What is it?
- Lamont Sanford: Poi.
- Lamont Sanford: [He takes a little with two fingers, licks it, then cringes, shaking his head] Poi oh boy!
- Fred G. Sanford: [after discovering the diamonds] With all these karats, I may never need glasses again!